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In this episode of The Turn On, Erica and Kenrya talk shit and wonder aloud who should play the leads in three of the books featured on the show this season.
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Kenrya: Come here. Get off.
Kenrya: Hey good people. It's Wednesday and that means it's time for another episode of The Turn On. Welcome.
Erica: Welcome y'all.
Kenrya: Yeah. So we're glad to have you all here with us. And today we thought we would revisit something we did in a quickie.
Erica: First season? I think it was first season.
Kenrya: The end of first season. Where we revisit some of the books from this season and talk about who we would cast in the movie version.
Erica: So first disclaimer: I'm old as fuck.
Erica: And like just suspend age, I went more for the feel of the actress and actor than I did their actual age. Okay?
Kenrya: Yeah. I ran into the same problem because I kept thinking about how old I thought they were when I was reading. But then also, I don't know young people.
Erica: I didn't even think about the age of the character. I just thought about this is the personality. I think this person could play that because at one point I was like, "Oh! I need somebody young," so I was like, "Raven Symone," this bitch damn near 40.
Kenrya: Yeah. No. I definitely kept looking up people and sometimes found that they were older than I was and I was like, "Oh! Okay." So yeah. Y’all just fuck age. What's that? It's a number.
Erica: It's a construct.
Kenrya: Ain't nothing but a number
Erica: It's a construct of the white man.
Kenrya: Yes. [crosstalk 00:01:50].
Erica: Okay, so-
Kenrya: These are people we think would play the roles well and fit the personality and the tenor.
Erica: Yes. So we start with “Rise of the Rain Queen.” And in this story, there were two... Well, there was a main character Ny who was the Rain Queen essentially. And Duni was her lover. Right?
Kenrya: Yes, who was a little older.
Erica: Yes. So, you can go first.
Kenrya: Okay. Put me on spot bitch, that's fine. All right. So what this one, I just went with. Yeah. Both of these women are much older than these characters. But I just felt like they could embody these characters and I wanted to see them play opposite each other. And so, for Duni, I have Jodie Turner-Smith and for Ny, I have Lupita and I feel like their ages are actually reversed, but I don't give a fuck, because I feel like Lupita can better play like this fucking warrior who becomes the Rain Queen. I wanted to see the two of them opposite each other like all I see is just beautiful fucking brown skin and white teeth and oh, longing... I just like they would play really well together.
Erica: And I'd like to see a sex scene. Okay.
Kenrya: Oh yes. Of course.
Erica: I have for Ny, Letitia Wright. Because I think-
Kenrya: Oh that's good.
Erica: ... she's young and she got the kind of tomboy kind of-
Erica: And then for Duni-
Kenrya: Oh well Letitia says some crazy shit than that now. You tried to put this [inaudible 00:03:35].
Erica: This was a struggle. Duni, Janelle Monáe. Because she's older. She's beautiful. I can see her like, "Ny, stop it!" That kind of thing.
Kenrya: I could see that. I don't know what, well, whatever. I don't know what it is about her acting that just doesn't ... I don't know [crosstalk 00:04:04].
Kenrya: whatever. It's just me.
Kenrya: I know. I know. But I think your matchup would be pretty great actually to watch on screen.
Erica: Yeah. Okay. Okay.
Kenrya: Next up. Let's do “White Whiskey Bargain.”
Kenrya: That's Jodie.
Erica: So, “White Whiskey Bargain.” Jodie Slaughter. The main characters are Javier, which is the Mexican American guy whose family is in the middle of Appalachia, and Hannah, who is Hannah Hawkins, who is the other main character. She's the newly bestowed matriarch of the Hawkins family. Right? So ... yes in the book, Javier is Mexican. Right?
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Erica: And I was trying to find a Mexican man that could do the rough gruff. But that seems like he's ashy feet dragging through dirt.
Kenrya: Nigga, somebody on Twitter say rub your feet together, if it sounds like the beginning of “Computer Love”— I lost it.
Erica: Okay. So I couldn't find a Mexican American that I knew. Right? So I think that for Javier...
Kenrya: Are you stalling?
Erica: No. Because for Javier, he's a Latinx actor, but he's Black.
Erica: Laz Alonso. Because I've been watching “The Boys” and that kind of thing. And so I think he do ... like the like soft yet gruff really well. And then opposite him as Hannah would be my good girlfriend, Regina Hall.
Erica: Now here's the problem. I thought of Regina Hall because she posted that cute little song on her birthday.
Kenrya: Oh yeah.
Erica: And when she turned 50.
Kenrya: Yeah. Yeah.
Erica: So the ages might be a little off-
Erica: ... but-
Kenrya: She's buff-
Erica: ... That's what I got. What about you?
Kenrya: Okay. So I ran into the same trouble in trying to find an actor. Also, so many of the Latinx actors who are like mainstream look white or are white.
Kenrya: Yeah. So that was the problem I ran into because he's Javier and it's not white. That was a bit of a struggle. So, and that said, I still ended up with one of these men being white. So Javier Bardem, who was still fine as fuck, he old.
Erica: I thought about him, but I was like, he's a little too old and I can't get past him being... no, that's the other guy, with the bowl cut. And what was it?
Kenrya: Oh, “No Country for Old Men.”
Erica: Yeah, by the say Six Wolves in Texas.
Kenrya: Okay. All right. But he's Spanish from Spain, he is white. He is also fine. And so, but then my other one was an actor named Adam Rodriguez, who I had to look him up to remember his name. You want me to send you a link? You can Google them.
Erica: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Kenrya: So Adam Rodriguez, listen, I got to click my link too. So he's Puerto Rican and Cuban and-
Erica: He's cute.
Kenrya: Yeah. He's a cutie patootie.
Erica: Was he in ... What is it? He just too skinny for me. I need like some heft on ’em.
Kenrya: Yeah. I mean I think Javier…
Erica: So you can be like-
Kenrya: ... has some more weight on them for sure.
Erica: This is ... that's heft.
Kenrya: He was... he's on ... apparently he was on-
Kenrya: ... “CSI: Miami.”
Erica: Was this nigga in “Magic Mike XXL”?
Erica: Oh Lord.
Kenrya: So yep. Him. So I feel like he's a good fit, but I legit had to look him up because I didn't know what his name was, but I remembered his face and his body was not too skinny in “Magic Mike,” so he can bulk up.
Erica: Oh, okay I stand corrected.
Kenrya: And then for Hannah I got Meg. Giving it to my good sis Meg Thee Stallion. Listen, Hannah is a boss, Hannah is thick-
Erica: I don't think that-
Kenrya: ... Hannah is smart as fuck.
Erica: I don't think that Meg ... I love Miss Meg. I literally ... in the mornings I wake up and stretch and part of it's a twerk. Because I want Megan, I want to be Megan.
Kenrya: But you want Meg knees.
Erica: But I don't know about the strength. I don't know if Megan will be able to shed Megan for a-
Erica: ... television roles.
Kenrya: That's fine.
Erica: But okay. I'm fine. I'm fine with it. Okay.
Kenrya: So let's say this is on Hallmark Channel. Lifetime?
Erica: She wouldn't be on Hallmark or Lifetime. If it was a BET Christmas show. right?
Kenrya: Yes. Yes. She got it. So Meg.
Erica: Javier, I don't want to eat your pozole.
Kenrya: Yes, but I just, I was thinking about that masturbation scene and how she could pull it off.
Kenrya: I'm just saying.
Kenrya: Give her some credit.
Erica: Okay. The final book, “Bittersweet” by good friend of the show, Christina Jones.
Erica: So who you got?
Kenrya: Well so, “Bittersweet,” just a little bit of information for those who haven't listened to that episode, and you should go back and listen to it, stars, Anika and Royal. They work together at a coffee shop and they're like co-managers and she's supposed to be like training him. So eventually he can go do a franchise of his own. But anyway, this is very much an enemies to lovers situation even though they clearly liked each other from the beginning. But they don't want to admit it to each other and whatever and then they end up fucking. So, for Anika, have you seen “Judas and the Black Messiah” yet?
Kenrya: Okay. So first of all, it's excellent.
Erica: I haven't had time to like-
Kenrya: Just stick with it-
Erica: ... Sit and watch it. Yeah because I
Kenrya: ... because it's two hours, but it flew by.
Kenrya: So the actress that plays Deborah, who ends up being the love interest, her name is Dominique Fishback.
Erica: Dominique Fishback, like fish and back.
Kenrya: Yes ma'am.
Kenrya: So if we want to go young, I think she would be great for Anika. Great face, really like naturalistic acting, which is like one of the things that drew us both into this book was that everything just felt like one of us talking to our friends and her acting style is very much like, "Hey girl!"
Erica: The person I picked, she ain't a Juilliard grad. I can send you.
Kenrya: But so I got her or if we wanted to age up, Niecy Nash. Yeah. Right?
Erica: All right. All right. Okay.
Kenrya: I'm loving some Niecy. And so then for Royal, so he is-
Erica: A jerk-
Kenrya: ... a little bit. Yeah. He's but a jerk with a heart of gold. You know what I mean? Like he fucks with her because he ... we talked about this on that episode about this whole thing that we've normalized, where people are assholes to you and it means that they like you, that little thing that we tell little girls. But that really is his character. Like he fucks with her because he likes her and eventually he gets over himself and is able to be vulnerable and just say that. But so ... but then he also fine, so the first person that came to my mind was Trevante because he fine.
Erica: Oh! Child, that man. Hell that man is fine for no fucking reason. Just fine. Ooh, fine.
Kenrya: So he was my first person. And then I was like, okay-
Erica: But here you have gold teeth in that movie, in that book. And I think-
Kenrya: Well, I mean he could if we say he did-
Erica: ... gold teeth do Trevante so fine.
Kenrya: We casting, right?
Kenrya: So we can put gold teeth. Yes. Put them grills back in. And then, so then I was like, okay, this is when I was still stuck on trying to find young people. I thought about this dude, literally, I was Googling and found him and was like, "Oh! That's how I know him". His name is Trevor Johnson. I would have never ... Jackson. I would have never known his name. He's on “Grown-ish.”
Erica: Yeah, no, he's too young.
Kenrya: He's so young. I know.
Erica: And maybe that's why I can't find anyone young. Because I need someone that exudes sex and--
Kenrya: They don't do that for me.
Erica: ... Trevor Jackson is like--
Kenrya: For the young. Maybe it's like for the young ones. Right? But then also on the heels of watching this brother play Chairman Fred, Daniel Kaluuya.
Erica: Okay. All right. All right.
Kenrya: Yeah. You'll see it even more after you watch the movie.
Erica: Okay. All right. All right. I got it. I got it.
Kenrya: Yeah. So those are my picks for “Bittersweet.” What are yours?
Erica: So I already said I'm not looking for an acting powerhouse. Right?
Erica: I need someone that's going to be on the go. So either Megan Good.
Kenrya: I aint saying shit.
Erica: Megan Good or Gabrielle Union.
Kenrya: Yeah. Yeah.
Erica: So for Royal, for some reason, I just kept seeing-
Kenrya: I just want to see Gabby in this. Yeah. Okay.
Erica: ... But for Royal, I just kept seeing like facial hair, goatee hair. I'm about to get real deep on you.
Erica: So VH1 used to do scripted shows. Right? Remember when they did scripted shows, they had that “Single Ladies” show. They also had this--
Kenrya: Yeah I used to watch that. Is that the one with LisaRaye?
Erica: Yes, they got really, really bad when it skipped to another network. It got-
Kenrya: Whoa. It was ... Yeah. I had to stop. Why? Because she left and they brought in that bitch Stacey Dash.
Erica: Yeah. Yeah. It got bad. But it was good. I used to watch it. They also had the scripted show called “Hit the Floor.”
Erica: It was about like some devil ... it was called like the devil girls. It was a basketball team, whatever. And there was the guy in there. His name was Robert Christopher Riley.
Kenrya: Is that the actor's name or the-
Erica: That's actor's name, Robert Christopher Riley. [crosstalk 00:15:17].
Kenrya: I ain't never seen this brother before.
Erica: But ain't he fine? He got the face hair.
Kenrya: He's Trinidadian and Bajan. He fine.
Kenrya: Especially when it's a goatee and not a full-on situation.
Erica: Yeah. Yeah. You just need like the ... just a little goatee. That's why I kept seeing a goatee. So-
Erica: I mean, yeah. His acting abilities ... Okay, I need eye candy.
Erica: So let me apologize to Christina, Fiona, and Jodie for my horrible cast. Because I'm like, I need eye candy, Kenrya is like "Who can deliver the best performance?” I'm like, “Who fine?” So--
Kenrya: Nice teeth too.
Erica: He do.
Kenrya: I'm on his IG. Yeah. Okay. I like it. I see it. Now I want to see all of these books made into movies. And for them to call us for casting.
Erica: Hollywood, call us.
Erica: We'll help.
Kenrya: Just general Hollywood.
Erica: Granted, it's not our stories and we're horrible at casting, but somehow The Turn On will be involved. Yeah.
Kenrya: Let's make it happen.
Erica: Turn On Productions. Alrighty.
Kenrya: Well, this was fun. We hope you all enjoyed and we would love to hear who y'all would cast in these books or any of the other ones that we've done in any of the seasons. It's a fun exercise.
Erica: Yes. You should try it. Alrighty.
Erica: Erica and Killa. Two hoes-
Kenrya: making it clap.
Erica: ... making it clap. I didn't give Kenrya a chance.
Kenrya: No, she's just excluding me from that whole thing at this point. It's fine though. Bye.
Kenrya: This episode was produced by us, Erica, and Kenrya and edited by B'Lystic. The theme music is from Brazy. Now you can support The Turn On and get off. Subscribe to the show on your favorite podcast app. Then drop us a five-star review and you'll be entered to win something that's turning us on. Post your review and email a screenshot to us at TheTurnOnPodcast@gmail.com to enter. Our Patreon pages also live, become supportive today, and access lots of goodies, including two for one raffle entries. Don't forget to send us your book recommendations and sex and related questions and follow us on Twitter @TheTurnOnPod and Instagram @TheTurnOnPodcast, you can find links to books, merch, transcripts, guest info, and other fun stuff at TheTurnOnPodcast.com. Thanks for listening and we'll see you soon. Holla.
The Turn On
The Turn On is a podcast for Black people who want to get off. To open their minds. To learn. To be part of a community. To show that we love and fuck too, and it doesn't have to be political or scandalous or dirty. Unless we want it to be.