Quickie 11 | Would You Rather...?

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SHOW NOTES
In this episode of The Turn On, Erica and Kenrya answer a series of "would you rather" questions.

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TRANSCRIPT
Kenrya: Come here. Get off.

Erica: Welcome, welcome, welcome. So this week we are going to go through a few random questions that I have come up with to maybe spark a little conversation.

Kenrya: You stay coming up with questions.

Erica: I know. Okay. So, would you rather accidentally send nudes to a stranger or to your ex?

Kenrya: To a stranger all day. Fuck them niggas. The idea of them thinking that there's any part of me that wants them or that would be trying to seek their attention or approval by sending them nudes makes me want to vomit.

Erica: So. Interesting you say that.

Kenrya: Did you do that?

Erica: Yes. I did. I didn't tell you this?

Kenrya: Oh yeah. Actually you did.

Erica: So...

Kenrya: I forgot about it.

Erica: So, as a part of breast cancer, my first step in the whole journey was a double mastectomy. So I had a double mastectomy. Both titties was chopped off, but I did the reconstruction. So-

Kenrya: And they look good.

Erica: ... they have become a party trick. People come over and, you know how they offer the little Andes mints at Olive Garden? I offer to show my titties. Because I do think that I have a really good reconstruction so far.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: So I was texting my girlfriends, sending them a picture of my titties. But my ex was texting me also, my ex-husband was texting me.

Kenrya: My God. Oh, my God.

Erica: And I accidentally sent him the picture. I mean, so it wasn't quite nudes, nudes. They were more like, "Hey, look at my Franken-titties." But he definitely got it, and was like, "Hey. Didn't expect to see them, but they look good."

Kenrya: So would you have rather been that, or been a stranger? See, everybody... you don't care about them seeing your titties.

Erica: Yeah, I don't care about nudes. Like, stranger X. I mean, okay. It depends on... Because I have nudes and then I have nudes. So I have nudes where I'm like busting it open. So I think I would rather send that to an ex than a stranger. Because my exes known-

Kenrya: [crosstalk 00:02:36] to be out there.

Erica: And my exes know me. They know like, "Oh shit, somebody getting this, wasn't meant for me." My exes know that my love language is nudes, are nudes.

Kenrya: Yeah, see, and I have only sent what, like two or three nudes?

Erica: And they're very coy nudes. They're not even like...

Kenrya: Right. Because you saw them.

Erica: You saw my nudes. You were like, doi-ng.

Kenrya: Right. Mine are waist up... basically just my titties in various artful configurations.

Erica: Yeah, right. So I mean, if it was like a busting it wide open nude, then ex all day.

Kenrya: Okay.

Erica: If it was like a Kenrya nude, then stranger, just because I want the stranger to be like, "Oh, girl. Yes."

Kenrya: You're so stupid. You know one of my exes stole my nudes, right? In college?

Erica: Yeah. And so I think-

Kenrya: Which is why I don't do them.

Erica: Yeah, I think that's, you have been... The power was taken from you-

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: ... in your nudes journey. Whereas me...

Kenrya: Yes.

Erica: I was always like, "Come on. Let's have some fun."

Kenrya: Yeah, no. This nigga stole... this was back when we had to do print out pictures. When he was supposed to be getting his shit-

Erica: You totally dated yourself.

Kenrya: ... he stole all my... What do you mean? Oh, dated myself. Oh yeah, yeah. Oh bitch, it's fine. It's okay. It's all right.

Erica: We used to have to go to the bookstore and turn in our film.

Kenrya: Literally. And what's crazy is that with that particular roll of film, my dumbass got it done at the bookstore, and I got two copies, and clearly someone had gone through them and took out a whole set of them shits. And then my ex ended up taking all the rest of them. [crosstalk 00:04:20] So I don't even have none of those nudes left.

Erica: Okay. Well I hate to laugh but yeah...

Kenrya: It's fucked up. It's fine.

Erica: Remember how you used to like the idea of pointing a camera and clicking and hoping that the shit came out.

Kenrya: Might come out good. Yeah. That shit's crazy.

Erica: And you only had 24 chances.

Kenrya: Yup.

Erica: The idea of a disposable camera used to be the shit like...

Kenrya: Yeah because then you can just drop it in but then you still had to wait on them shits.

Erica: But still.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: I think I moved probably like 10 years ago and found a big ass bag of disposable cameras.

Kenrya: Oh that's dope. Did you get them-

Erica: You know I threw them away.

Kenrya: No, of course you did. Oh, bitch. Literally everything. I want you all to understand.

Erica: Ain't no point in holding on to that shit.

Kenrya: So a bitch threw it away.

Erica: My brother was like, because I was throwing away food in the fridge, he was like, "You throw everything away." I was like, "No." He was like, "I bought a potato. You threw it away the next day." I was like, "Well, it was looking like it needed to be thrown away."

Erica: I try not to be that wasteful. Okay. Would you rather have bad sex or no sex?

Kenrya: No sex... wait. You mean just like partner sex? Like bad part... Because then I'd just have no sex quote unquote and have sex with myself.

Erica: No sex at all.

Kenrya: Oh. What makes it bad?

Erica: Like you can't come when you want to, but it ain't good.

Kenrya: Oh. I would rather not have sex.

Erica: Yeah. Same. I'll just live-

Kenrya: Yeah. Oh, my God. That's got to be so...

Erica: ... a dusty pussy life.

Kenrya: Yeah. It's got to be incredibly frustrating to-

Erica: Unfulfilling.

Kenrya: ... never get that release? Wow.

Erica: That's exactly what I thought about.

Kenrya: It's like niggas talk about blue balls. It sounds awful.

Erica: Yeah. I think so.

Kenrya: Because I'm going to come regardless.

Erica: Either he going to watch me, or I'm going to the bathroom, but I'm coming.

Kenrya: Oh, I'm not going to bathroom. You can go in the bathroom. Guess who gets to finish. Every time.

Erica: Every time. Okay. This is along those lines. As I thought of this question, I wish we could record your face.

Kenrya: Oh, boy.

Erica: Would you rather have sex on a bed covered in animal hair, or on a dusty floor?

Kenrya: On a dusty floor.

Erica: I just thought of you in cat hair, and your allergies, and all of that. That sounds disgusting.

Kenrya: You know that I can't even be somewhere where a cat has been without getting sick. Like, you all, to go to E's house, because she's got this big old dog, our studio dog, I have to take a Zyrtec, and that's after I already took one when I woke up and the night before. I be fucked up.

Erica: My bad, my bad.

Kenrya: It's fine. You didn't make me super allergic to every fucking thing. But no, I would die.

Erica: So, dusty floor.

Kenrya: I'm allergic to dust too, but I'm less allergic to dust than I am to dander. What about you?

Erica: Yeah, I'd have to do a dusty floor just because I think of animal hair like sand and it gets places. And I don't need animal hair in my coo-cat.

Kenrya: Oh, I hadn't even thought about that. That sounds like death.

Erica: That's what I think about. Okay, last question.

Kenrya: Okay.

Erica: Would you rather live in a world with no ashy niggas or no anti-vaxxers?

Kenrya: I mean the Venn diagram is a circle.

Erica: Not always. Because there are some ashy niggas that believe in vaccinations.

Kenrya: Are there?

Erica: I think so.

Kenrya: But there are no anti-vaxxers who are not ashy niggas.

Erica: Yeah.

Kenrya: I mean I guess I would say no ashy niggas because it's a bigger circle, right? So the anti-vaxxers are inside the ashy nigga circle.

Erica: No.

Kenrya: Why not?

Erica: There's also white women that are anti-vaxxers.

Kenrya: Fuck them bitches. They don't even come into my worldview. But wait, this means that there's no white bitches?

Erica: No, just anti-vaxxer white bitches.

Kenrya: I mean, I ignore them. I'm going to go with no ashy niggas. What about you?

Erica: I think I'd say no anti-vaxxers.

Kenrya: Really? Why?

Erica: Just because, I mean, I'm thinking about us living in quarantine right now and we need vaccinations-

Kenrya: Yeah, there is that.

Erica: ... and all that. And then no anti-vaxxers does get rid of a large subset of ashy niggas.

Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Erica: And it also takes care of the Goopers of the world.

Kenrya: Oh, okay. Yeah. Those white bitches. Okay, yeah, no. I like it.

Erica: Okay.

Kenrya: I think I'm going to stick with the... because ashy niggas are like the bane of my existence.

Erica: With lots of rings on their fingers. That part being ashy.

Kenrya: Yeah. You know I got some ashy niggas in my past who are also anti-vaxxers, so this gets rid of them.

Erica: Yeah. Yeah.

Kenrya: I like it.

Erica: All right. Okay. Well, with that, that wraps up this week's quickie. This is Erica and Kenrya.

Kenrya: Shit.

Erica: Two hoes making you clap. Oh, bitch. I don't think that was at the same time, but okay.

Kenrya: It was almost. Whatever. I be trying.

Erica: This episode was produced by us, Erica and Kenrya and edited by B'Lystic. The theme song is from Brazy. We want to hear from y'all. Send your book recommendations and all the burning sex and related questions you want us to answer to TheTurnOnPodcast@gmail.com. And please subscribe to the show on your favorite podcast app. Follow us on Twitter @TheTurnOnPod and Instagram @TheTurnOnPodcast and find links to our books, transcripts, guest info and other fun stuff at TheTurnOnPodcast.com. And remember, the turn on is now part of the Frolic Podcast Network. You can find more shows you'll love at Frolic.media/podcast. Thanks for joining us and we'll see you soon. Holla.