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SHOW NOTES
In this bonus episode of The Turn On, roles reverse and Erica and Kenrya interview each other as the other person. (Yeah, it's confusing...just listen.)
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The Turn On participates in affiliate programs, which provide a small commission when you purchase products via links on this site. This costs you nothing, but helps support the show. Click here for more information.

TRANSCRIPT
Kenrya: Come here. Get off.

Erica: Okay, so y'all welcome to The Turn On. This is quickie number two. Hope y'all are missing us, but hopefully this is something to kind of ease those fears of Erica and Kenrya ain't coming back.

Kenrya: Yeah we definitely be back. We ain't going nowhere.

Erica: Yeah bitch, we coming back. Okay. For this quickie... Last quickie Kenrya and Erica interviewed each other. This time we're going to interview each other but, you are going to hear us answer the question as the other person. So does that make sense? You will hear Erica's voice, but Erica is answering the question as she thinks Kenrya would answer it.

Kenrya: It's going to be interesting.

Erica: And then, we'll allow Kenrya to clear it up. Okay? So, yeah.

Kenrya: Okay.

Erica: Here it goes. First question Kenrya. Well Erica, this is Erica speaking to Kenrya. Erica, are you a morning or a night person?

Kenrya: Bitch, listen, I can't stay up past like 9:00/9:30. I be in the bed. If I call you after 9:30, you know it's something wrong. And then around 1:30 in the morning I wake up and I check email and I send you random texts and then I'm up at like what, 5:00/4:30 something stupid in the morning and then I do shit. I watch episodes of shows that I got sitting around. I respond to emails. I make lists of things. Sometimes I go work out and then I go to work at butt crack. Yeah. Well is there anything to clear up?

Erica: No, there's clear nothing to clear up. Okay, so this is Kenrya.

Kenrya: Kenrya are you a morning person or a night person?

Erica: I am a night person. I want to, I might wake up early, but I want to lay in bed. I want to just hear the birds chirping. I want to roll over and have sex with my beautiful partner. But the bulk of my work and activity gets done once my little baby goes to bed, once my little goes to bed, then I pile myself on my couch cross-legged and I am just diving in and getting the most of the work done and then in an effort to avoid bothering Erica instead of sending texts, I send her a million emails, because she knows Erica is going to check emails and they're not so intrusive. So I am a night person.

Kenrya: Yes, bitch.

Erica: We definitely won supermarket sweep.

Erica: Yes. Okay. Maybe not supermarket. What is love connection.

Kenrya: Yes. Answering the questions right. No, what's the one? The Dating game.

Erica: Where they hold up the thing. I keep seeing a woman with red hair and a bowl cut. It's probably wrong, but we talking about the same joint. All right. What'd you got for me?

Kenrya: Describe your ideal vacation. Kenrya.

Erica: Hot. Water. Laying around. Maybe learn something about Black people.

Kenrya: Only thing I would add is I need like several books.

Erica: On your phone.

Kenrya: That's it.

Erica: Okay Erica. Your favorite vacation.

Kenrya: Hot sand, water, paperback books because I like to have a real book in my hand. I do not fucking read on my phone and the kids are nowhere around. Lord have mercy.

Erica: Only thing I'd add is weed and liquor, but I mean damn same thing. Okay, Kenrya. Well okay. Erica, what did you want to be when you grow up?

Kenrya: Bitch Erica didn't know. Okay, well so yeah, I don't know. It could be something that allowed me to tell people what to do. I also like Black people stuff, so I would maybe go get a degree in Black people's stuff.

Erica: Which she did.

Kenrya: I think I just wanted it to be able to tell folks what to do to control some shit.

Erica: So when I was really little I wanted... This is Erica speaking as Erica. When I was really little I wanted to be the first Black female president.

Kenrya: Shut up.

Erica: That's only because I thought it was like I could tell niggas what to do. I didn't think about like the fact that you actually had to like be responsible and shit. I it was just like no, I tell you I want to and you do it.

Kenrya: You have to do it because I'm the president.

Erica: So this is young Kenrya speaking. What I wanted to be when I grew up... I want to be a writer because I love books so much. If I could be like my favorite author, Danielle steel or VC Andrews I would, but I want to tell stories and make people feel happy the way that books make me feel. If they could be representative of me as a Black woman and a baby Black Panther, that would be fantastic too.

Kenrya: So I didn't come to that till later.

Erica: Oh shit.

Kenrya: Yes. So when I was really little, I thought I was Whitney Houston.

Erica: So favorite fact about Kenrya. Kenrya was supposed to be auditioning for the gospel choir.

Kenrya: I was in the gospel... Oh that story.

Erica: She was supposed to be auditioning for the gospel choir and she went to her daddy and said... Oh I think you told this.

Kenrya: I wrote it in my book. It's in “How We Fight White Supremacy.”

Erica: She went to her daddy and said, "Daddy, I need you to listen to me sing two songs because I'm about to audition for choir and I need you to tell me, which song I should sing."

Kenrya: Oh my God.

Erica: The first song she sang was, "Do you mind if I stroke you up? I don't mind. Do you mind if I stroke you down, all through the night." So this bitch fucking thought she was going to stand in front of the school and sing Stroke You Up by Changing Faces featuring pedo R. Kelly.

Kenrya: Yeah, we didn't know yet.

Erica: What was the second song?

Kenrya: The second one was “At Your Best You Are Love.”

Erica: Yeah, some Aaliyah shit. Oh, this pedophile had a grip on our junior high years? Kenrya definitely thought she was gone... Every time I hear… What was the song you're hand bell choir sang? No, your choir. What was it?

Kenrya: “Ain't No Stopping Us Now.”

Erica: Every time I hear “At No Stopping Us Now” I think of Kenrya because every time that song come Kenrya would say, "our choir sang ‘Ain’t No Stopping Us Now.’”

Kenrya: I sang in this inspirational choir. It was run by the radio station WZAK. It was our Black station and we sang all over the state, so we used to open circuses. I sang with Total at Geauga Lake one time bitch. We sang with Mase and we sang with Hammer.

Erica: Hammer?

Kenrya: Yes. When he was, when he was doing gospel.

Erica: Hammer did gospel? Was this after pumps in a bump?

Kenrya: We opened for him on some stage. I sang all over in random places. We made a Christmas album, all of this. So I really wanted to be a singer when I was a kid, but I never thought I wanted to write and even when I began my career, I began as an editor and then when I decided to work for myself, I realized that most of the work at that point was in writing and that was what forced me really to start to write all the time.

Erica: Okay interesting. I was wrong as fuck. Your shoulder is real glistening.

Kenrya: Yeah. You know I be moisturized.

Erica: Moisturized

Kenrya: Ooh, okay. So Kenrya, which is better drunk sex or high sex?

Erica: Well, Erica, since this is Kenrya. I have a prescription card and so I appreciate, I enjoy going to my dispensary and talking to my dispensary-ologist about my particular needs and they may give me a good strain that increases my sensation and heightens my mental awareness.

Kenrya: Is that a thing?

Erica: I don't know, but that's some shit that you'd be saying. You'd be like, girl, I found a strain. It's called Scooby doo, H Y U and they say it. So yes. Kenrya believes that high sex is better than drunk sex.

Kenrya: Yeah, I like high sex and I do have a card because I have anxiety and it helps me tremendously with that and my insomnia and drunk sex, it's cool, but if I drink I get sleepy. So at least with that I can actually be awake, alert and shit.

Erica: All right.

Kenrya: Yeah, I'm an old lady when it comes out.

Erica: Okay Erica. Erica, what's better drunk sex or high sex?

Kenrya: Oh wait, I'm supposed to answer that.

Erica: Erica what's better drunk or high sex.

Kenrya: I like both the drunk and high sex, but I prefer to puff on some flower. Right. I don't know, I refer to smoke before I have sex, which I don't know. All right. Is that accurate?

Erica: You're wrong. So here's the thing, it's a little weird... I enjoy getting my weed from the weed man.

Kenrya: You like flower. Which I have asthma and that be fucking me up.

Erica: I'm not on some fancy this is what it does. I enjoy, "nigga what you got? Give me the bag." So high sex can be good. I really like drunk sex, the only problem is...

Kenrya: Do your head be floating away?

Erica: Here's a problem with drunk sex. Drunk sex, if you already drunk it be fucking with your gag reflex. Remember that story I told you about in New York? I'm about to tell y'all way too much about me. I'm out with a friend. We are just enjoying life. Had a great, great dinner. Went to this Italian restaurant. The food was so fucking good. We had like a bottle, two bottles of red wine. Which is great. We get back to the hotel. We're just into each other. Red wine flowing, pasta in our bellies. We start fucking. I'm hanging off the edge of the bed. I started giving dude head, I start deep throat and he started fucking my face deep throating it and I fucking gag. Literally I vomit red wine and pasta all over the place. It was so disgusting and what made it even funnier was how cool he was through the thing. I'm hanging off the side of the bed and he's fucking my face and I'm giving him deep throat. Then I vomit and I'm trying to sit up. So essentially I'd be vomited in the bed instead of on the floor and he's like, no, no, no, you're okay. Just chill. Just hang out. Just chill, just holding my head up. It was so horrible. Yeah, he was so calm the whole time. Then so I'm vomiting shit. So there's a fucking a pool of red wine and spaghetti on the floor.

Kenrya: That's why I always wear shoes in hotel rooms.

Erica: He gathers it up with sheets or some shit, I don't even fucking know and I go take a shower. I get out of the shower, this nigga laying in bed like so, “Oh yeah, you was on step three of deep throating me. You going to get back to that right." We continue to fuck.

Kenrya: Step three?

Erica: On another random note. He fucked up his knee playing basketball. So we were fucking and the scab tears apart. So he's fucking me. So we wake up in the morning, it's a fucking pile of red wine, vomit, fucking noodles in the corner and there was blood all across the sheet because as he was fucking me his scab opened. It was just disgusting.

Kenrya: I hope y'all left a big tip.

Erica: I was so embarrassed. I ran into the housekeeper on the floor. I left the hugest tip because I would just fucking light a match and burn everything down and she liked cleaned it and was so sweet. Dear lady at the hotel in New York, you are appreciated. You are appreciated. So all of the say I enjoy drunk sex. However, the logistics that come in mind with it makes it a little difficult. So I think I like high sex too. Cause when I'm high, I just get real sensual. I'm like, Oh look at the feel of your...

Kenrya: Yeah. For me, stuff is heightened.

Erica: Senses are heightened.

Kenrya: Versus when I'm drunk I feel like my head is floating away.

Erica: So Erica, what's your stripper name or porn name?

Kenrya: Erica. Kenrya what's your stripper or porn name?

Erica: Kenrya.

Kenrya: Your stripper name is whatever your name is.

Erica: Yeah, right. It's like that meme. Your stripper name is your first name and your last name. Your hoe name is your first name and your last name because you a hoe.

Kenrya: That's right, nothing wrong with that. What is a song that describes your fucking style, not your love making style, but your fucking style? Kenrya.

Erica: Shake it fast. Shake it fast.

Kenrya: You know what makes this shit even funnier? My song for you was Danger. popping pussy on a handstand.

Erica: It's so problematic and what's fucked up is I'm not particularly athletic, but I will certainly be like, yo, I saw this shit and we're going to try and we're going to do it. Which brings me to my next question. Erica, Have you ever tried something in a porn and it failed epically?

Kenrya: I think I just told a story about deep throating on the side of the bed and vomiting. So yes I have.

Erica: This is Erica, the real Erica. Yes, that is true. As Kenrya, something in a porn that failed epically. No, only because I am Kenrya and I will fucking research and think the fuck out of anything before I try it. So if there something that I want to try, then I'm going to research it and then I'm going to practice and check the angles and the wind resistance and the direction of the moon shifts before I do it because it's going to work very well.

Kenrya: This is fucking accurate.

Erica: Bam.

Kenrya: Good job.

Erica: Well, that wraps up quickie number two.

Kenrya: I hope you had as much fun as we did.

Erica: Erica and Kenrya, two hoes making it clap.

Kenrya: We hope you enjoyed this week's quickie. We're hard at work on season two of the turn on and finding fantastic books, a share and amazing experts to join us in the studio and we are counting the days until we get to return to you on January 1st in the meantime, hit us up at TheTurnOnPodcast@gmail.com with your book recommendations for season two and your burning sex and related questions. And then go ahead and follow us on Twitter at the turn on pod and Instagram at the turn on podcasts so you don't miss a minute. And remember, the turn on is part of the Frolic Podcast Network. You can find more shows you'll love at frolic.media/podcast. Thanks for listening and we'll see you soon.

​LISTEN TO THE TURN ON
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SHOW NOTES
In this bonus episode of The Turn On, Erica and Kenrya tell their friendship origin story and interview each another.
​​​
The Turn On participates in affiliate programs, which provide a small commission when you purchase products via links on this site. This costs you nothing, but helps support the show. Click here for more information.

TRANSCRIPT
Kenrya: Come here. Get off.

Erica: Okay y'all. Here's the deal. Here at The Turn On, we are finished with season one.

Kenrya: Ayyyee.

Erica: Ayyyee ayyyee. I'm doing that cool kid dance where you do like this.

Kenrya: Oh, okay.

Erica: So we're finished with season one. We're loading for season two but look, y'all: a bitch is tired. I'm motherfucking tired. So in the meantime, in between time, we're going to give you guys what we call a little quickie.

Kenrya: Yeah. We're not going to leave y'all out here.

Erica: We ain't going to leave y'all hanging with a dry dick or a dry pussy.

Kenrya: What's the non-gender version of that?

Erica: A dry area.

Kenrya: Ass? I mean everybody got a ass.

Erica: We only out with a dry bussy.

Kenrya: Yes.

Erica: Everybody got bussy right? So we aint gonna leave yall out here with a dry bussy. So we are recording and going to give to you guys each week a little quickie, which is a little-

Kenrya: A little taste.

Erica: A little taste of something to tide you over until we come back for season two.

Kenrya: When do we come back?

Erica: January first like motherfucker.

Kenrya: New year, new season.

Erica: Hey, I'm dancing. I'm sorry y'all. I've been drinking all morning long.

Kenrya: She really has. I am stone cold sober. We'll see how this goes.

Erica: Okay. So.

Kenrya: January 1, 2020.

Erica: January 1, 2020, we'll be back in this bitch.

Kenrya: With full episodes.

Erica: Full length episodes.

Kenrya: New books, new interviews. All that.

Erica: Lots of hot shit coming for you. Spitting hot fire.

Kenrya: I spits hot fire.

Erica: On this mike like Dylan, Dylan-

Kenrya: Dylan, Dylan.

Erica: Oh shit. All right, so for our first quickie. As y'all know, Kenrya and I are bottom bitches and I think it will be interesting for y'all to listen to us interview one another.

Kenrya: Yes. We didn't really tell y'all a lot about ourselves when we started the show I feel like.

Erica: Did we tell the Tae Bo tape story?

Kenrya: The who?

Erica: Tae Bo tape.

Kenrya: No, I don't think so.

Erica: Okay. So-

Kenrya: This is sidebar before we get into it.

Erica: Kenrya and I and someone else, you know who you are.

Kenrya: Hey, girl.

Erica: Shout out to you. We all went to school together, and we were all interested in a particular sorority and we see each other at programs and so we were like, you know what? I like you. We should be friends because we going to be linesisters.

Kenrya: That's not what happened. Somebody told us we needed to know each other.

Erica: I was trying to tell the sanitized story, but anyway. So-

Kenrya: That's not illegal.

Erica: We needed to be friends. We knew we needed to be friends because we was going to be linesisters. So they said, Hey, y'all need to be friends. So we were like, okay, how does any other young lady in 19-

Kenrya: No, it was 2000 something.

Erica: 2001 become friends with another young lady? You show up at her dorm room with a VHS tape.

Kenrya: Of Tae Bo.

Erica: Of Billy Blanks' Tae Bo so that you can work on your body for homecoming. So-

Kenrya: We was doing high kicks and punches.

Erica: It all started with a Tae Bo tape and the two of us plus another one who will always stay special in our hearts.

Kenrya: And we still together.

Erica: We still kicking it high. Back then it was for like strong abs. Now we kicking it half our dicks.

Kenrya: Dicks, right.

Erica: And pussies.

Erica: Okay. Sorry y'all, I'm like so drunk. Okay, so we're going to interview one another. If y'all have more questions that you'd like for us to answer, we'll probably do a round two of this, but these are the questions that we came up with.

Erica: So first question, Kenrya.

Kenrya: Yes.

Erica: So let me say, I came up with most of these questions-

Kenrya: Yeah, you did.

Erica: So they are very Erica questions. So Kenrya, if you were on a Real Housewives franchise, what would be your tagline?

Kenrya: Oh God. Okay. So remember when I did ... It's something that I actually say about myself because it's true. Okay. There's two.

Erica: Okay.

Kenrya: There's the totally appropriate for one of those shows and then there's the, Ooh, I read version. So the first one is I'm a Aries from Cleveland, what the fuck am I supposed to be scared of? Which is something that I say-

Erica: So true because I clearly remember nights in New York City where Kenrya has popped off. Kenrya's nickname is Killa Ken-

Kenrya: For a reason.

Erica: For a motherfucking reason. Okay.

Kenrya: Yeah, so that's accurate. That's something that I've said during many book signings when people have asked me dumb shit. And then I think the sanitized version, not sanitized, but the one that's on my intention board right now is a quote from Audre Lorde. It's I am deliberate and afraid of nothing.

Erica: I love it.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: Okay. So you say that, and I have two.

Kenrya: What was your- yes.

Erica: Both of mine come from the great guru Trina. The first one, and imagine me in a great flowing robe and then I flip around and toss my-

Kenrya: Got to toss our hair.

Erica: Non-existent hair and I look in the camera and I say, I'd probably fuck your daddy if your mammy wouldn't play a hating.

Kenrya: Oh, god. The accuracy. The fucking accuracy.

Erica: And then the next one, same situation. I flip around and I say 10 in the face, slim in the waist, fat in the ass. Do you want to taste?

Kenrya: Oh my God, bitch is coughing.

Erica: My bad.

Kenrya: It's all right. It was funny.

Erica: So yeah, my foundation is on the patron saint Trina. Her and Audre Lorde are the two-

Kenrya: Like the patron saints of the show.

Erica: Patron saints of The Turn On.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: So okay. Yeah.

Kenrya: That works. I'm going to ask you the next one.

Erica: Okay.

Kenrya: What does a perfect date look like for you?

Erica: Okay, so I enjoy experiences so, well first I enjoy food. So feed a bitch. We got to have good food, we got to have good drink. But then I want to do something so it could be like a concert or a hike. I mean, it don't really matter. I'd like-

Kenrya: Hike, bitch?

Erica: Yeah I would-

Kenrya: I mean, you do like doing-

Erica: Yeah, I like doing shit.

Kenrya: Like white women in Patagonia shit.

Erica: Yeah, but then I be out there blasting Trina out my backpack. Oh my god, this fucking bitch, she kept singing this song about like asses and pussies and juicy twats. That would be me. So yeah, it would have to include food, liquor, and activity, but not anything that jumbles my gut too much because I definitely-

Kenrya: Yeah, then it's all bad.

Erica: I am supposed to be staying away from dairy, but it would probably involve like dairy and liquor. So I need something that's going to not make too much of an emulsion.

Kenrya: Got to stay away from the cheese.

Erica: All this shit going on in my stomach.

Kenrya: Lordy.

Erica: But nonetheless it would have to be like wine, food, activity.

Kenrya: I like it.

Erica: You?

Kenrya: So I like to get a little dressed, you know. You saw me in shorts and a tee shirt the other day and you was like, bitch, I don't think I've ever seen you dressed like this.

Erica: Oh my God. She looked like a homeless woman. The thing is, it was some shit that like-

Kenrya: I was tired.

Erica: But it was some shit that normal people wear. It was like a family reunion tee shirt-

Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative). And some like big huge gray shorts.

Erica: And some basketball shorts-

Kenrya: With a drawstring.

Erica: Which is literally my- I have a variation of that on right now. However for Kenrya, I was like this bitch is going through some shit and I need to have an intervention.

Kenrya: I took a nap on the couch. I was tired because we had just finished recording.

Erica: I didn't even know you owned family reunion shirts. I thought when they gave out family reunion shirts at your family reunion, you were like, you know what? No, I prefer a screen print holographic.

Kenrya: I literally keep them just to sleep in and only to sleep in when I'm by myself because I sleep naked when I have a partner in the bed.

Erica: Oh fancy.

Kenrya: I do.

Erica: Nasty.

Kenrya: So I wanted to go somewhere. It doesn't even have to be, you know I wear sequins in the daytime so I just like to dress. So part of it is being with somebody who is not intimidated by the fact that I'm probably going to have on a crop sequin crop top, which is something that I own.

Erica: Yeah.

Kenrya: And I also like to be comfortable. So something cute and flat that is not going to have me all fucked up. So I'm not thinking about going home.

Erica: Sequins, flats. Okay.

Kenrya: Yes. And I like to eat so I want to go somewhere where I can get something that's not meat that is delicious. And I have three quarters of a glass of champagne or a cider beer because you know more than that and a bitch is sleep. I just-

Erica: I'm bloated.

Kenrya: I can't drink no more.

Erica: But I'm still fucking.

Kenrya: Oh yeah no. Well you know, sometimes I fall asleep but whatever. Then I just wake up and fuck later. It's fine. That's another part of the date. I would like to have sex on this date if it goes well, then that's a part of that. And then it really varies. I like to switch it up so it could be a movie. I fucking love movies. Like across the board it's one of my favorite things to do with somebody who I know already. You can't really do movies with a new person because then y'all don't-

Erica: Yeah, I'm not a movie gal. I mean I do movies because that's-

Kenrya: You do movies when I forced you to go to movies with me.

Erica: What normal people do.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: Like I have this guy that I'm dating and I actually really like him and he loves movies and so we watch movies together.

Kenrya: Right.

Erica: And I do it for him. I mean most of the movies are good, but I'm just like-

Kenrya: It's not your natural, because I'm like-

Erica: We could be eating and playing Uno.

Kenrya: Looking every week. Yeah, what's coming out? What can we go see?

Erica: Yeah, exactly.

Kenrya: And if we're not out, then we're finding one in the house to watch. I like a good movie. But I've also had a lot of fun go-kart racing and what else have I done that was fun? Oh, doing them sip and paint things.

Erica: Oh, is this something new that you've learned that you'd like to do now that you're dating or is this a you knew that this was in you the whole time?

Kenrya: I mean, I think it kind of depended because when I was dating before I was married, it was New York so it was mostly going out to eat and walking around the city. Then I was with broke niggas so we was walking through the park, having a picnic, which is also fun. I just like doing shit. It don't really matter to me honestly. It's more about the person who I'm with-

Erica: The person you're with, yeah.

Kenrya: Because I could be literally sitting around in a robe watching fucking Mad Men and that's fun as hell. It's just that the person is not boring.

Erica: Okay.

Kenrya: So yeah, that's a long ass answer.

Erica: No, it's fine because I added a lot to your answer too. Okay.

Erica: So I always say, I'm going to tell you how I came up with this question. So I've dated like one white guy. I might have fucked a few white guys, but I believe that, you know how like I don't want to make sweeping stereotypes about races-

Kenrya: But you finna?

Erica: But yeah, I am about to. Just ignorance alert. So you know how if you go to the Olympics and you look at the Olympics and you see the last 10 years who's won gold medals in basketball, most of the people holding gold medals in basketball are probably black men, right?

Kenrya: Yeah. I think that's accurate.

Erica: If you went to the pussy eating Olympics and saw who held gold medals, most of the people would be white men.

Kenrya: Really? I've never had my pussy ate by a white person.

Erica: I'm sorry, y'all can't see me. I literally was like what? Yeah, I would think that most of the gold medal winners would be white man. I'm not saying that black men aren't good at it. Maybe it's the thing of access. Y'all didn't grow up with pussy eating pools in communities as a kid, but nonetheless yeah. White men, Olympic level. There are black men that definitely are the Simone Biles of pussy eating like woo, you really cut through the-

Kenrya: The chaff, the racism.

Erica: Yeah, I was about to say the chaff. You know I'm making up words. You really cut through the wheat. But yeah, white men. So if you were to go gold-

Kenrya: For a sexual act?

Erica: No, if you were to-

Kenrya: Because I got that one. That's dick sucking.

Kenrya: I'm fantastic at it.

Erica: So if the ordinary Olympics were held today. Ordinary Olympics, 2019-

Kenrya: Like not work stuff. Like shit around the house.

Erica: Just whatever. Like ordinary Olympics. What would you go gold in?

Kenrya: I don't know if it's not work. I'm a fucking workaholic.

Erica: Like, well what would you go gold in?

Kenrya: Listen, I can edit like nobody's motherfucking business. I make everything better that I touch.

Erica: If you have received anything via mail, text message, fucking carrier pigeon by Erica in the last, how long have you known me? 20 years?

Kenrya: Yeah, just about.

Erica: Motherfucker. Kenrya has edited it.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: Period point blank.

Kenrya: I'm fucking amazing at editing everything.

Erica: And she's good and she's quick.

Kenrya: Yeah, that's my shit. I was trying to think of a household task, but honestly I mean probably laundry because I stay doing laundry but then I don't fold it.

Erica: You don't like it. So no, you wouldn't go.

Kenrya: Yeah. Like right now my dryer has three loads of laundry, of stuff in it because it was on my bed.

Erica: I'd be silver in laundry.

Kenrya: Would you?

Erica: Yeah.

Kenrya: No, my shit's not folded. I just stuffed it back in the dryer so I.

Erica: If it was household Olympics, I'd definitely be the fucking Russia of gymnastics.

Kenrya: Yes, you would.

Erica: I'd be like high stakes.

Kenrya: That's real shit.

Erica: But just one event that I would be fucking gold in would just be in finding efficiencies. Like people come to me and be like, I have this problem. How can I make it easier-

Kenrya: Faster, more economical, all that.

Erica: Like how can I make this easier for me? How can I make it faster? How can I reduce the stress? And that's what I do. Finding efficiencies? Bitch, I go gold.

Kenrya: Yeah, real shit.

Erica: If you want to drill down, nigga, making a list or a fucking spreadsheet, a timeline. I'm fucking gold at that. Like I enjoy rigidity, which is probably why I like getting restraints and shit during sex.

Kenrya: Interesting.

Erica: Yeah. I enjoy rigidity.

Kenrya: Okay. I do not.

Erica: That's kind of gross. But no, I mean it's not gross.

Kenrya: No, it's not at all.

Erica: Okay. Your turn.

Kenrya: Sure. So what was your favorite food as a kid?

Erica: Looking back, I think my favorite food as a kid was my mama's fried pork chops because she bought them cheap ass thin ass pork chops.

Kenrya: You know I don't know nothing about pork chops.

Erica: Oh my God. And she'd just fucking bread them and fry them and for some reason I can taste that shit right now. Maybe because I haven't had it in a while and now I'm drinking and I might start crying because I'm in my feelings about missing my mama. But my mama's fried pork chops, it was just a random let me pull these motherfucking pork chops out and fry them. She bread them and just fucking sprinkle some Lawry's on it probably. It was probably some Murray's or whatever the St Louis ... What was it? Pete's Market, which is the equivalent of Murray's in St Louis.

Kenrya: I don't even know what Murray's is.

Erica: Because you ain't eat meat. Murray's was on H Street. I don't know if Murray's is still open, but it was this hood supermarket. But anyway, it was just my mama's pork chops. My mama's fried pork chops. They were so good. I did not know until I moved out here that people eat apple sauce with pork chops. I was like, that's some-

Kenrya: White people shit, yeah.

Erica: It was definitely some white people shit. We would have pork chops and Kraft macaroni and cheese and whatever canned vegetable was-

Kenrya: Canned vegetables.

Erica: Canned vegetable du jour.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: But my mama's fried pork chops. I don't even think that it was like if you asked me as a kid was that my favorite? I probably wouldn't have been like that was my favorite.

Kenrya: But in hindsight.

Erica: But in hindsight, whenever them fried pork chops came out, them was my motherfucking shit. What about you?

Kenrya: Mashed potatoes. I ain't got no story bitch. I just like mashed potatoes.

Erica: And that is all you need.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: A good carb.

Kenrya: So the next question is what's your favorite now? And honestly it's just carbs. I can't pick one. So you know I bake a lot. I've been trying to bake less because I eat it. But lemon cake, I got my grandmother's lemon cake recipe finally.

Erica: You lemon cake is good.

Kenrya: Yeah, lemon cake, lemon bars. I finally found a really good recipe for that. I like lemon.

Erica: Yeah.

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: Little sweet, little tart.

Kenrya: I make a-

Erica: That describes who you are in your yellow sweatshirt.

Kenrya: It's true. Yes, as I rock my crop sweatshirt. Ooh. And apple pies.

Erica: Bitch, your apple pie. Bitch, you aint make a apple pie last year.

Kenrya: I did make apple pie last year.

Erica: But now that we're closer I could actually get some.

Kenrya: Exactly. And I'm going to make a few of them so I'll make one for y'all.

Erica: Bitch don't make one for me. I'll just come upstairs and get some because I'm not going to eat-

Kenrya: Why not make it for your whole house?

Erica: They ain't going to eat it enough.

Kenrya: So you're going to eat it before they get to it [crosstalk 00:18:13].

Erica: Of the apple pie.

Kenrya: Yeah, carbs.

Erica: Right now I think my favorite food is homemade fried chicken.

Kenrya: So that you make?

Erica: Well it's something that somebody ...

Kenrya: It's got to be somebody-

Erica: Not Popeye's. Somebody's mama got some chicken, thawed it out, fried it. Well got some chicken, sprinkled some Lawry's, bread it in some regular-

Kenrya: And fried that shit hard.

Erica: I don't need that double battered dipped shit. No, just fucking fried chicken. And I think it goes back to the pork chops. It's just that I ain't trying to eat pork like that. I mean I fuck up some pork but I ain't really eating pork chops like that. But yeah, just some homemade fried chicken with some good ass hot sauce.

Kenrya: Okay. I like it.

Erica: I feel like every time I go out and I get fried chicken, I'm chasing like homemade fried chicken. It's like bitch, you should just fucking fry some chicken at home.

Kenrya: But I'm about to say is that ever as good as just-

Erica: No. And I should probably just be frying chicken at home but I shouldn't be frying chicken at the house.

Kenrya: How often do you, I almost said, because one of my favorites is-

Erica: I have a little Fry Daddy.

Kenrya: Oh yeah you do.

Erica: But who wants to fry chicken at home? Then you got fucking fried chicken grease.

Kenrya: I mean there's that. Like my kid requests fried fish and spaghetti because yeah-

Erica: Maybe we'll fry some fish this week. We going to put a pin in that. I'll fry some fish this week. You make some pasta, and we'll feed the kids.

Kenrya: All right.

Erica: All right. So when you were a kid, what seemed like the best thing about being an adult? When you were a kid, what was just like when I'm an adult, I'm going to do bam.

Kenrya: I mean, honestly I think it was just this general like I get to do whatever the fuck I want to do. The idea that somehow as an adult that you have not boundaries but like-

Erica: Can't nobody tell me nothing.

Kenrya: Can't nobody tell me shit. Yeah.

Erica: You know what? I think that's why them kids think that, Old Town Road.

Kenrya: That's exactly how they want to feel that way. And I think that that was what I thought adulthood was going to be. But I ain't realized-

Erica: 'Til Sallie Mae telling you what the fuck you're supposed to do.

Kenrya: Exactly.

Erica: 'Til your job tell you what the fuck you're supposed to do.

Kenrya: When you were a kid, you just had your guardians and your teachers telling you what to do. But now God damn, they just won't leave me alone.

Erica: That's why I enjoy the idea of being a submissive, like tell me what to do. So I ain't got to worry about nothing else.

Kenrya: I don't like people telling me what to do. It is one of my biggest peeves. So that and passive aggressiveness.

Erica: Okay. So take it a step further. What's your favorite thing about adulthood now that you're an adult?

Kenrya: Probably that I do what I want but I don't.

Erica: Okay. If you had to name one thing that's like, Oh this makes me feel like an adult. What would it be?

Kenrya: Probably leaving out of my house in the middle of the night to go fuck or ... being like I'm going to go do this right now at a time. Especially if I don't have my kids. So it really is there's no accountability. Like I just fucking go and if it's not with a stranger so I don't have to send my location to you so I can legitimately just leave on my own. And I ain't got to tell nobody where the fuck I'm going and I just go do it. And then it's dessert in the middle of the night or it's getting some head in the middle, whatever the fuck. I feel like those are the moments when I'm like, yeah, ain't nobody looking over my shoulder because I hate people looking over my shoulder. This is why I work at home.

Erica: True.

Kenrya: I'm not built for that.

Erica: Okay. So for me it is, I know it sounds so fucking simple, but I'd like cool air but I also like fresh air. So I will turn up the AC high as hell on my car and roll down the windows.

Kenrya: Yes, yes, yes, yes. That's another.

Erica: I'll take the top off and fucking have the AC be on. I be riding like, you know what mama? Suck it because I got the AC on and the windows down.

Kenrya: That's a great one. And I do that shit and I do, I feel like such a fucking autonomous adult. Then my music is always loud and ignorant.

Erica: Ignorant.

Kenrya: Yeah. It's a beautiful thing.

Erica: Okay, cool. All right. What you got for me?

Kenrya: Okay. Oh, okay. What is your favorite random fact about me?

Erica: Oh.

Kenrya: Right now I'm sitting here trying to think of what's my favorite random- Ooh, I got it.

Erica: Now here's the thing. Now I've been drinking, I might actually cry.

Kenrya: Mine ain't sweet.

Kenrya: Okay let me think of a sweet one.

Erica: No, don't even, don't even. No, the thing is, Kenrya is just like I look at you ... So let me just say, when I think about, and this goes back to therapy and all this shit, but I think about who I was as a dirty little kid and I think like I am living a fabulous fucking life. I am blessed to have the people in my life that I have in my life. And so I look at you as my best friend. I'm like, yo, this bitch, my best friend. She love me and I know all her shit. Like, and so I just think you are a dope ass person all around and I feel blessed for you to let me in on that.

Kenrya: Oh, that's actually a big deal because you know I don't fuck with most people.

Erica: What? Tosses hair. Gotcha, bitch.

Erica: No, but I mean I just feel really blessed to have the people in my life, but bigger than that, have you as my best friend. Because I sit back and think about the things you have done. I be bragging on you like I gave birth to you. And so it's just really fucking dope to have you in my life, but also for you to let me in your life. And so I'm just like, yo, this bitch is fucking amazing. I mean not even a random fact, but just the fact that you're an accomplished author. You've written so many books, like this bitch be on TV. I be sending clips to my family, like yo, when she was here, I was watching her daughter. I helped her pick out that shirt. So yeah, not necessarily a random fact, but just the fact that you have ... then knowing you so well and seeing where you've come from. Like it's just like yo, this is my bitch. Like this is my bitch. So yeah, that's my favorite random fact that you let me in.

Kenrya: That's very sweet.

Erica: Right?

Kenrya: Yeah.

Erica: So, okay. And now here comes Kenrya with some ignorance.

Kenrya: I know. My shit ain't sweet at all. But thank you. That's amazing. Erica is also dope. See, I felt like that nigga who shall not be named, but who likes the 45th president who has all the amazing quotes, and we can't use him anymore. I would like to say we dope and we do dope shit.

Erica: Yeah, but he's horrible.

Kenrya: But he's ruined everything. Fucking dude.

Kenrya: My random fact is that Erica don't fuck with birds.

Erica: I fucking hate birds. Yo I was out with a dude the other day. Told him this story how I was out. How I damn near broke up with a boyfriend in college because this motherfucker was letting the seagulls follow me on the Jersey shore. I'm like walking around with a fucking hamburger. Like get them the fuck away. He was like, yo, you're holding a hamburger and fucking seagulls are following you. That's what the fuck they do. I don't fuck with birds.

Kenrya: You don't fuck with birds. We took the kids to the beach, and they was hungry. She was like, y'all got to get in this tent.

Erica: Eat that shit quick as fuck. I'm trying to eat as fast as I can.

Kenrya: Them kids ate them damn sandwiches in like three minutes because she was scared of them damn seagulls.

Erica: I don't fuck with birds.

Kenrya: You don't, and you never have.

Erica: Fuck you.

Kenrya: And it is hilarious.

Erica: Okay, so this wraps up this episode-

Kenrya: Our first quickie.

Erica: Of quickies. Yay, yay, yay motherfuckers. Yay, yay, yay. So Erica and Kenrya, two hoes making it clap.

Erica: We hope you enjoyed this week's quickie. We're hard at work on season two of The Turn On, finding fantastic books to share and amazing experts to join us in the studio. And we're counting the days until we return on January 1st. In the meantime, keep hitting us up at theturnonpodcast@gmail.com with your book recommendations and burning sex and related questions. And follow us on Twitter @TheTurnOnpod and Instagram @TheTurnOnPodcast so you don't miss a minute. And remember The Turn On is a part of the Frolic Podcast Network. You can find more podcasts you love at Frolic.media/podcast. Thanks for listening and we'll see you soon.