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In this episode of The Turn On, Erica and Kenrya take a stroll through Erica's sex life, from her first kiss to what she wishes she could snap her fingers and change. Let's go!
The Turn On participates in affiliate programs, which provide a small commission when you purchase products via links on this site. This costs you nothing, but helps support the show. Click here for more information.
Kenrya: Come here. Get off.
Kenrya: Hey good people. Welcome back to this week's episode of The Turn On. So today we got a little special treat, little something different. Regular listeners of the show know that we sometimes do a thing called "This is Your Sex Life," where we talk to folks and dig all up in they business about their sex lives from the beginning to now. And today we're going to dig in Erica's business.
Kenrya: Hey girl.
Erica: Hey boo!
Kenrya: Are you ready?
Erica: I mean... okay. Yeah I'm ready.
Kenrya: You got it. Okay. So we going to get right to it.
Kenrya: When do you first remember masturbating?
Erica: I was little. Probably five, six. I was young. This was before we even moved into the house I grew up in. And we went to Disney World, my mama and daddy bought me one of them big ass Minnie Mouses, as she was the right size. I just be going at it. Minnie was my girl.
Kenrya: All right. I like it. How old were you when you had your first kiss?
Erica: With Rockbiter, y'all know the story. So it had to be like sixth grade. So 11, 12. And the thing is it was so nasty.
Kenrya: Okay. Wow. I don't think in my mind, I wasn't thinking that-
Erica: I was in the sixth grade and like-
Kenrya: I didn't know how old you were. Okay.
Erica: My son's in the sixth grade. I'd have fucking fit if he- but you know what? I got that kiss and it fucking scared me off. Because we ain't know what the fuck we was doing. And it was just...
Erica: Like one of those lantern fish.
Erica: So, yeah.
Kenrya: Poor thing. Poor little tink tink.
Kenrya: So how old were you when you first had a sense of your gender identity? Like when did you first feel like a girl?
Erica: I never didn't not, you know? I never didn't. I always find that a weird question because, yeah. Because I think no one ever really like knows it until it's imposed on them by someone else. And so I think I first realized that... So my older brother, he was just a year older than me he was gay. He was gay, he's gay.
Kenrya: He is, yeah.
Erica: And so I think him being my older brother, for so long it was just normal for me to be a girl. And in my parts, I know I'm getting into sexual identity versus gender, but anyway, just ride with me on this train.
Erica: Yeah, and so I just kind of always knew that I was a girl and he was a boy and he was a boy that just happened to like boys, you know? And it didn't become something different until we got older. And thankfully my mom was understanding, not understanding, you know, it wasn't a big deal to her.
Erica: And so we were exposed to people who weren't born with the infrastructure that they really were. So yeah, that was a long ass way to explain that.
Kenrya: Can you tell us about when you first started experimenting with other people?
Erica: I had a family member, we used to hump. It was just kind of one of those, we ain't know what we was doing. So I was young for that and then fucking Rockbiter. I don't know if it was with Rockbiter or just that same summer. But I think I have my junior high yearbook around here, I'm going to find it and show you Rockbiter. Not you the listeners, just you Kenrya.
Kenrya: I was about to say you show me. Yes, I need to see.
Erica: Yeah, I don't know if it was with Rockbiter or if it was Rockbiter adjacent. But yeah, we'd go play in a creek and they had this big flat rock. We just go and hump our little hearts out on this rock with the neighborhood kids.
Kenrya: Oh my God.
Erica: That's what we did.
Kenrya: That's just what y'all did.
Kenrya: Okay so tell us about the first time you had partnered sex.
Erica: Y'all niggas know this.
Kenrya: I know, but everybody may not have listened to that episode. I can't even remember what episode it was.
Erica: It was the first episode of the entire-
Kenrya: Nope, we talked about, nope we talked about anal.
Erica: And I talked about my first time.
Kenrya: We decided it would be cliche. I know, I thought we decided that it would be cliche to talk about our virginity on our first episode.
Erica: Find it. It was after band camp. We all went over some dude's house. It was a bunch of little dirty kids there. I was probably like 15. I was a freshman in high school. And it was after summer band camp. Went to this dude's house, some little dude liked me. I was like, "okay." And we ended up having sex.
Erica: We had sex on a water bed. Which was horrible for two little dirty kids that didn't know what you needed to do in order to really- you got to have gravity and leverage.
Kenrya: Leverage, yeah.
Erica: And we was just flopping around in the bed. And then somebody walked in on us and I was just kind of... And we kept going. It was not an enjoyable experience. I feel like I am sad, not sad, but you know, I wish that my first time having sex would have been with someone that like made it good. That I wanted to have sex. For me it was just more like a, "Oh, you here, you got a dick, let's explore" type thing.
Kenrya: Which I mean at 15 that makes sense. What skills is he going to really have?
Erica: Yeah. But I think about like the young ladies that like have sex for the first time with a guy that they really like, or they really want to have sex and it's like, "I need penis in me." That's what I would, if I could redo it, that's how it would have been. As opposed to like, y'all keep talking about it on these stories, in these songs. So let me figure that out. This is probably a really bad advertisement for Tipper Gore and all that other shit, but okay.
Kenrya: Okay. When did you first have an orgasm?
Erica: With a partner?
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Erica: I can't remember. I remember that I had one. Who was I with? I should- we ask this of everyone and now I'm like, I can't remember who I was with but I-
Kenrya: Listen, I'm sitting here trying to think my damn self.
Erica: I definitely think I was still living in St. Louis. So it was either in high school right before college or the summer after my freshman year. Because after that I wasn't living in St. Louis. And yeah, there was this little dude and he was just tall, skinny. He probably wasn't even cute. Tall and skinny. And he lived in the attic of his mama house and we went there and that nigga blew my back out to the point where I was just like, Jesus Christ. Yeah, and after my first hit, I kept chasing that high.
Kenrya: Wow. Okay. So what three words would you use to describe sex in your teens?
Erica: Dry. Like literally my pussy was dry. Dry, awkward and curious.
Kenrya: Hmm. Okay. What about your twenties?
Erica: A little more uptempo. So let's say, you did music, not quite moving fast but just a little more like tst, tst, tst. And more exploratoratative. Explorative? Exploratoratative?
Erica: Exploratoratative. Okay.
Kenrya: Exploratory, bitch that's not a word.
Erica: And I was doing it wrong in my twenties. I was like searching for love.
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Erica: Yeah. I was searching for love. And I think that's why now my thirties I'm like, "Fuck love!" What's love got to do, got to do with it? Yeah. I think that- what'd you say?
Kenrya: I knew that was coming.
Erica: You knew it was coming.
Erica: I feel like I was doing like sex in my twenties all wrong, you know? I was just scrolling through Instagram and there was this meme, it said girls be giving their heart to niggas who only asked for pussy. That's what my twenties were.
Erica: The sex was good, but it was like, I was focused on the wrong things. I should have been focused on just enjoying myself and having a good time and getting to know people. But instead I was focused on finding a relationship that would lead to marriage and yada, yada, yada. And so I ended up having good sex with some people, but it was just good sex. It wasn't like good relationships or anything like that.
Kenrya: That's interesting. And it's what we're socialized to do. Right?
Erica: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Kenrya: We're taught that the only time that you should really be having sex is in the service of, well, typically it's phrased as a man, but in service of a partner.
Kenrya: Or to have kids or whatever the fuck else, never just, hey, this shit is fun.
Erica: Yep. But I will say, I had my first threesome in my twenties. First time I had sex with a woman, all of that happened in my twenties and it was fun. And that's why I say exploratoratative. I can't wait to see the transcriber do exploratoratative. I think it was fun because I was learning and experimenting, but shit got lit in my thirties. Those my three words you ain't even got to ask me, shit got lit in my thirties.
Kenrya: What made it lit?
Erica: So when I was married we were having sex. But after my divorce, I really started coming into... I was more comfortable in my body. I was more just, you know how when you're in your twenties you hear women in thirties say, "Oh, the thirties are the best." And like, yeah. And then the forties, bitch. Y'all ain't going to be able to say shit to me. Because I really don't give a fuck. #GutsAndButts2021. That's my summer hashtag I decided to rebrand my ample shape.
Kenrya: Thick and juicy is now guts and butts.
Erica: Exactly so yeah, guts and butts 2021, because I was just trying to be, th-th-th-thick but now I got a little gut, so we're just going to roll with it. There's a lid for every pot.
Erica: But yeah so in my thirties I got more confident, not even confident, more comfortable in my skin, comfortable just letting my legs lock like a goat and falling off the dick.
Erica: It just became, it was a lot. I got quality over quantity in my thirties. And I knew I was honing in on what quality sex was for myself. So yeah, shit got lit. And I think a lot of it also was just like the rest of my life coming into focus, not saying that I got it together, because bitch don't. But you know, as the rest of my life comes together sex is just a part of that that comes together.
Kenrya: Could you tell us about a sexual experience that you remember fondly?
Erica: I'm not going to tell that one because that one's wild. Oh, right after my divorce I had a big ass brunch with my girls and then after that I got on the train and I was like, I'm going to go spend the weekend being a mercenary, literally like a hired dick assassin. And I spent that weekend with this lovely couple and we literally drank champagne, listened to music, enjoyed the finest weed, ate and fucked. For literally like Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Erica: It was fucking amazing, gorgeous. It was just like, oh, so yeah. And I think part of what made it so good was just, it was a couple that enjoyed experimenting and playing and we had fun and we laughed and we played with toys and we had good conversation and we had good meals. Because you know, honey, you mix food with anything and you got me there. So yeah, we were all comfortable with each other and comfortable just having fun.
Kenrya: So what's your sex life look like now?
Erica: Girl, it is very sporadic. We kind of talked about this, I took myself off the apps because I got a lot going on and... Yeah I got a lot going on. And trying to cultivate a relationship is just like, ehh.
Erica: I do have a partner that's kind of my slow and steady. We just keep at it when I'm ready for some sex or a booty rub because he know how to rub a booty. Yeah. So I have a partner and we have sex from time to time. It's not like it's anything regular. It's just when we want to have sex, we do. But I think it's just because I'm in grind mode otherwise.
Erica: Also, all these meds and stuff, I'm in a chemically induced menopause and on top of that, taking some new psychiatric meds. And so, that has totally fucked with my- I keep saying my pussy broke. And so I'm in a process of like changing my meds and stuff. Because I used to could look at a mop and be like, "God damn, look at that fat ass on that mop." Now, not so much. So I'm also working through adjusting my meds, seeing how things work, diet and exercise and all that to see if that'll bring my pussy back to life.
Kenrya: Lift things up a bit. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, that kind of ties into the next question. How many times do you have some type of sexual contact in a week on average?
Erica: So I recognize that my pussy's broken, so I make myself masturbate. But you know, I masturbate at least once or twice a week just because I'm like, I have to. I keep saying it's like a earring back. I got to use it or it's going to close up. And then also I got all these cool toys. So I definitely have some sort of sexual contact about once or twice a week. And then occasionally I'll call somebody and be like, "Hey, what you doing? I'm going to stop by." So yeah.
Kenrya: Are there certain times that you prefer to stop by? Are you a morning person? You're not, but-
Erica: Y'all know I have problems with morning sex. Like, only because of the logistics of breath. Because my breath be spicy in the morning.
Kenrya: Nobody's paying attention.
Erica: But it be fall off the bone baked, fall off the bone tender. So I do like morning sex. I'll take it any time to be quite honest. Each time has its own pros and cons. I feel like morning sex is great because it's just good and gushy. Evening sex is good, but you know, I don't fuck around. Sleep, food, and sex. Erica don't fuck around with it. So when I'm ready to go to bed, we're going to get done. It's going to be quick. I'm going to wash my face, put in my retainer and I'm going to bed. And then afternoon, that's when I get to languish in it and have fun. So yeah.
Kenrya: Yeah. Word. And that's kind of the next question. How long does it typically last?
Erica: Oh, bitch. You ain't going to stay on top of me fucking for 45 minutes. You're not penetrating me for 45 minutes. Get the fuck up. No. But I do enjoy foreplay and all of that. So I would say probably start to finish probably like 20, 30 minutes.
Erica: But you know, and then we might have a couple of rounds, drink some Kool-Aid watch an episode of “First 48” and then get back at it.
Kenrya: Does this usually happen in a bed or are you a anywhere you happen to be kind of person.
Erica: I will literally fuck anywhere. I mean, now it's usually in the bed or on someone's couch. But I'll fuck anywhere. I mean, that's what God made it for, it's like a stand.
Kenrya: Lord have mercy. What's your favorite part of sex?
Erica: Orgasms. We read in some book, someone described it as your body shattering in a million pieces and it coming back together. Was that in a book?
Kenrya: I don't remember.
Erica: It sounds too nice for me to have thought it up. So I'm going to say somebody else wrote it, but it feels like your body shatters into a million pieces and you slowly come down and you're just like, "Oh, give me a cold glass of red Kool-Aid." You know? I'm going to have to say it's the orgasm.
Kenrya: That's a theme here. What's the most frustrating part?
Erica: Being a woman and having a pussy. Pussies are pockets, they need care and feeding and I have a temperamental pussy and a temperamental stomach. Back to food. And so all engines got to be in "Go," it's like a fucking NASA center in my head. Like, "Stomach okay? Doo. Pussy feeling good? Doo. All systems are go." Pussies require care and feeding. You don't want to BV, STDs, fucking waxing. It's just a lot that goes into it. So that's the frustrating part.
Erica: And more than anything it's because I make it a point to be with niggas that don't care. Some embarrassing shit has happened to me before in bed. And most of them be like, "All right." But it's just, I want to feel comfortable in my body. And so that's what makes it difficult.
Kenrya: Are there things that get in your head that are ever able to keep you from being able to enjoy yourself? Or are you really good at turning those things off?
Erica: If I'm not comfortable, like I said, if I'm not comfortable in my skin. And that will be things like, "Oh my God, my breath is fucking rancid." And I think a lot of that also is I grew up in a very judgey household. And so I feel like I'm not comfortable because I feel like they're judging me, even though they're like, "Ehh." I guess that goes against everything I just said. Again, most of the guys I am with are like, "Bitch, I don't fucking care." But in my mind, I'm like, "I care, you should care. A bitch breath stink." Or, "I'm gassier than a motherfucker" you know?
Erica: But then I get to a point where I'm like, "Okay, bitch you done rolled out the red carpet, let it go." And so I do. Because if I'm going to go through all the shit that it takes to open up my legs and fuck, this shit going to be a payoff, right? I'm just not going to do it for fuck's sake.
Kenrya: I mean, that's literally what you are doing.
Erica: I mean, yeah. But you get what I'm saying.
Kenrya: You said earlier that you try to masturbate once or twice a week. Is Jerome still that nigga or-
Erica: Girl, girl so I've been playing with a lot of different toys lately and all of them require a charger. You've got to charge it like you're charging a phone. So it's usually whatever is charged. My little rubber ducky has been getting, I masturbated with it the other night and scared myself. Because I was like "Oh shit!" I was like, wait. Thankfully my son wasn't home but he definitely surprised me. So yeah, Donald is getting lots of play.
Kenrya: Okay. I think I know the answer to this, but what would you change about your sex life if you could snap your fingers and make it so?
Erica: What did you think it would be?
Kenrya: Well, your pussy is this acting a monkey right now, so I figured you would just snap your fingers and fix it.
Erica: Oh yeah, that. But I was thinking I would be hairless, well not completely hairless, but like, I'd like a shorn puss. I actually am thinking about getting laser. So that, which I actually think I can do.
Erica: And yeah, having a read out on my pussy, this is what's wrong as opposed to having to fucking tinker with it to figure out what's going on.
Kenrya: Yeah. Testing all the fucking levers to see which one is the one. Yeah. That's what's up.
Kenrya: What is a sex best practice that you want to share with our listeners?
Erica: One, pee after sex. I have a little bidet with the, "Shhhhh" I like that. That's a good practice. Two, don't let people with dirty fingers in your pussy, tell him to go wash his hands.
Kenrya: I mean, if your fingers is dirty, then your dick probably is too. So, ew.
Erica: And then also if you're really trying to let a nigga deep throat it, hang off the side of the bed and make that straighten up.
Kenrya: Does it help with the gag reflex?
Erica: Mm-hmm (affirmative). At least for me. But again, I eat everything.
Kenrya: So we normally ask people if they have any must have tools, but we talked about that on every episode, so-
Erica: Every episode. Wait-
Kenrya: What's turning us on.
Erica: Thank you.
Kenrya: Yes. All right, would you rather give up partnered sex or masturbation?
Erica: Because I'm lazy. I'd rather have somebody else do it.
Kenrya: What do you hope that people will learn from this walk through your sex life? Like what's the big takeaway?
Erica: That sex is human and can be funny and feel good. And sometimes it's about making mistakes and just learning your way through it.
Kenrya: Word. What's turning you on today?
Erica: What is turning me on? I went to the grocery store and found some pumpkin seeds. I've been eating pumpkin seeds like I'm walking to school every day. So pumpkin seeds are turning me on. And then I have dinner reservations for a really good restaurant tonight. And so, food bitch! So dinner and pumpkin seeds.
Kenrya: And you are fully vaccinated so you can go safely do that.
Erica: Yeah. I'll tell you about the place later because I'm not trying to give all my details, but yeah.
Kenrya: Yeah, no don't do that. Cool.
Kenrya: Well, that wraps up this week's episode of The Turn On. How did that feel?
Erica: I feel like y'all heard some of this already, but it felt good.
Kenrya: We do this every week, but yeah, I think it still gives a little slice of.
Erica: Everyone something in one episode. So you don't have to listen to every episode.
Kenrya: Yeah. But you should listen to every episode. You should subscribe also and you should also then go and watch them on YouTube so you can see us. Do all those things. Yes.
Kenrya: But before you go do that, let us thank you for joining us. Because we're done with this episode. We appreciate y'all and we'll see y'all next week. Bye!
Erica: Peace out! Two hoes making it clap.
Kenrya: That's us.
Kenrya: This episode was produced by us Kenrya and Erica and edited by B'Lystic. The theme music is from Brazy. Hit subscribe right now in your favorite podcast app and at youtube.com/TheTurnOnPodcast so you'll never miss an episode.
Erica: Then, follow us on Twitter @TheTurnOnPod and Instagram @TheTurnOnPodcast. And you can find links to books, transcripts, guest info, what's turning us on and other fun stuff at TheTurnOnPodcast.com.
Kenrya: And don't forget to email us at TheTurnOnPodcast@gmail.com with your book recommendations and your pressing sex and related questions.
Erica: And you can support the show by leaving us a five-star review, buying some merch or becoming a patron of the show. Just head to TheTurnOnPodcast.com to make that happen.
Kenrya: Thanks for listening. And we'll see you soon. Holla.
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In this episode of The Turn On, Erica and Kenrya share dispatches from listeners about what they learned about sex during the pandemic.
The Turn On participates in affiliate programs, which provide a small commission when you purchase products via links on this site. This costs you nothing, but helps support the show. Click here for more information.
Erica: Come here. Get off.
Erica: Hey, y'all, welcome to this week's episode ... Wait. Hold on, my bad. (silence).
Erica: Welcome to this week's episode of The Turn On.
Kenrya: Our producer is going to think something is wrong.
Erica: What you say?
Kenrya: He's gonna think something wrong.
Erica: No, it's the echo effect.
Kenrya: I know-
Erica: Dear listeners, you all need see this in YouTube so you can see the joys of this golden mic.
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Erica: Okay, I turned it off, okay, I'll turn off the mic.
Erica: Okay, you all, welcome to this week's episode of The Turn On. I am your host, Erica, and I have my lovely hoe-host, Kenrya.
Kenrya: Hey, y'all.
Erica: This week we're giving you a quickie. We are going to talk about what COVID has ... We did a dispatch to ask what COVID has taught our listeners about sex and intimacy, and relationships, and all that good shit.
Erica: So, Killa.
Kenrya: Okay, I guess that's my signal to play the first “dis-tatch.” I can't even say it. Dispatch. Okay. Let's see, who should we listen to first?
Erica: The Black woman.
Kenrya: They're all Black. I think we will start here.
Speaker 1: COVID has allowed me to explore a deeper intimacy with my partner, looking beyond any of the ... Physical things are great, but just, really, because I think a lot of us have slowed down, you're able to really kind of do a deep dive and get even closer to your partner. So I think that that's been a really beautiful thing. We do the late-night sit up and talk, we cuddle more. I think all of those things, if there's a silver lining to any of it in the pandemic, and how you relate to your partner in that way, I think that's it.
Erica: You want to kick off thoughts, or shall I?
Kenrya: Go ahead.
Erica: I just, I think it's nice. I mean, I think COVID has taught ... I mean, she brings up something that I realized, is that COVID has caused everything to slow down, and because everything is slower, you pay attention to more things.
Erica: I feel like I've become a better parent because of COVID. I mean, yeah, still want to choke him out sometimes, but I feel like I became a better parent because I am now savoring our everyday interactions, and it sounds like that's what they're doing in their relationship.
Kenrya: Yeah, it does. I was thinking about whether or not I've seen that same thing over on this end. I feel like that's a big part ... A big part of my relationship with my partner is us sitting around doing absolutely nothing anyway. So it has been a bit more of the same, we’re still on the same schedule, as it were, in terms of how often we do all of that, but it has just been nice to sit.
Kenrya: I think the slowness, for me, is really around the same lines as it is for you, in terms of with my kid. We're not racing from this after-school club to this art therapy to this dance class to this violin and, what other instrument does she play? Something else. Piano lesson. It's been nice because it's made me kind of re-evaluate what's necessary-
Kenrya: In terms of being out of the house. You know I already welcome being in the house anyway.
Erica: Girl. I'm like, "Girl, just start your car, just don't go bad." You're-
Kenrya: I do. I have doctors appointments every week, I do go, but you know I just had to get something fixed with idler, or whatever, something I had never heard of, idle pulley, because it does ... I let my kid, sometimes, go sit in the car just for a change of pace, but it's messed up the car, because I don't go anywhere enough.
Erica: Damn. Well.
Kenrya: I know. And the tires on one side need air in them more often because they on concrete and not on gravel. It's a whole thing. But my partner takes it and puts air in them, I don't think about those things.
Erica: Love it.
Kenrya: But it's been nice to slow down around that, and rally made me think about when she's back in school full-time, how many of these things we're going to pick back up and how many of them we going to leave right where they at, on the ground.
Erica: Yeah. Yeah, I totally agree. Even just with my life and the things that I'm doing. Some of this shit going to be dif- I have given up clothes, real clothes-
Erica: I've said this multiple times.
Kenrya: One of my gorgeous gowns.
Erica: Well, I've said this all the time, you know how you see movies and they talk about in the future, and in addition to the cars that fly everyone's wearing yoga clothes with no zippers and that kind of shit-
Kenrya: Like in a post-apocalyptic movies where everybody's wearing the same shit?
Erica: Yeah. Yeah, and you're like-
Kenrya: Sweaters with holes in them.
Erica: "How the fuck did that happen?" COVID. Everybody was forced at home, no-one had to wear pants, and so now we're getting back out and it's like I refuse to go back. Your grandkids are going to come to you and be like, "Granny, can you believe that they made pants out of denim that had buttons and zippers?" You're like, "Yeah, back in the day."
Kenrya: Wow. Yeah, and I gave up on them shits somewhere along the way. It's true.
Erica: Because I sit here in my, this is like this shit from Demolition Man.
Kenrya: We've moved on. We figured out what's most important. So, yeah. No, that was nice. All right, let's, we got some more. Let's get into another sentiment entirely.
Speaker 2: How was our sex life during quarantine? Well, let's see. I spent quarantine with my mother, my three-year-old, and my husband. Sex got pretty tricky at times. My mother was here because she had come to babysit my child while my husband and I went away for to go to a wedding. By the time we came back she was scared to get on a plane, so she stayed here, for over a year.
Speaker 2: My husband, I'm used to him being on the road two, three, sometimes four days a week. So when he would come home on weekends, you have sex, because you're home. We just kind of got in this routine of it always being exciting because we were apart for most of the week.
Speaker 2: Well, during quarantine I saw him every day. And my mom was here. And my son had nowhere to go. So some days we were exhausted, because I feel like the entire country was tired. When we did have sex, it was a different dynamic because my mom's down the hall, and even though we're grown, it still feels weird.
Speaker 2: Because we saw each other every day, and we're so used to being apart and then we get back together, and it's so exciting, we had to figure out new ways to make it exciting, and quiet at the same time. It got tricky, but we made it. We had a couple of patches where it got a little boring and it started to feel a little robotic. There definitely were times where it felt like we were doing it just out of comfort because the entire world was crazy, which then also made it not so fantastic.
Speaker 2: I found it interesting when my single friends, who were complaining about not having sex and, "Oh, you get to sleep with a man every night, or just have a partner every night, because he's right there with you." Yeah, but I see him every day now, sun-up to sun-down, and I don't want to have sex with him as much as you think I want to have sex with him. You just want to have sex because you haven't been able to have sex.
Speaker 2: So just because I sleep in the bed with my husband every night, doesn't mean that we're just wild banshees in the house because we don't have nothing else to do. No. It got old.
Kenrya: All right.
Erica: Exactly. Well, listening to this reminded me of the one thing that I always say, is that a marriage is a contract between two people, and whatever goes on between those two people to make it work is their marriage.
Erica: Some people would not be able to do a regular, every day with a guy, with a person that traveled all the time and was never at home, but sounds like that's part of what makes this marriage their marriage. Yeah. I thought that was-
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative). What makes it tick.
Erica: Very telling.
Kenrya: Yeah. Just, honestly, the idea of having another adult in my home for any length of time that's more than a weekend is frightening to me. I just, very much, I believe that adults can't really live together if they not fucking. I just, I don't like it, there ends up being too many people around, I'm just not that person, I'm not that roommate, communal living ... I just, it ain't me-
Erica: It works here.
Kenrya: I aint had a roommate since college.
Erica: Well it works in my house-
Kenrya: Because we're in separate homes.
Erica: It works because my space is so separate. I can go for a minute without seeing my roommate. Only reason it works.
Kenrya: Yeah. But it ain't-
Erica: They have their own bathroom, entrance, all of that. They cook, which is helpful. It's not like your space-
Kenrya: What made you talk about your brother like he's a random person?
Erica: Well I'm not sure if I told people that my brother lives with me.
Kenrya: You have, absolutely.
Erica: Oh. Well then, yeah. He cooks.
Erica: This is why I can't lie, because I can't keep up with shit. Yeah. So, brother.
Kenrya: But, yeah. Yeah, I ain't, mm-mm (negative). I briefly, when we, years, a lifetime ago, bought a house in Baltimore City and we were waiting on repairs-
Erica: I remember.
Kenrya: And we had to stay with somebody. Nigga. Yeah. It was so-
Erica: I remember that.
Kenrya: It was so tough for me that I left for a few days and went and stayed with somebody else.
Erica: I remember that. You were like, "I can't do this shit."
Kenrya: Yeah, and it's not about the person, I just don't do well ... I just don't do, I don't. I like my space, I like my solitude, I like to not have to listen to somebody talking all the time. Honestly, that's one of the hardest parts about being a parent, because I feel like-
Erica: "Mama. Mama. Mama." Yeah.
Kenrya: It's always, like I'm working all the time, but then when I take breaks, it's like that's when she come too, so I finally got to tell her a couple weeks ago ... Yeah. I was like, so the only breaks I really take during the day are when I eat. I was like, "I'll be honest, I don't have the bandwidth, I don't like to talk while I eat." I want to just sit here, read a little bit, maybe I'll look at Twitter if I forget that I got a book that I need to be reading, and just do that and turn my brain off just for a little bit, for 15 minutes before I got to get back to work.
Kenrya: But I got to listen to what just happened on Roblox, I got to listen to who said what crazy thing in chat, who's spamming the chat with Naruto over and over again in class, and not getting in trouble. Yeah. All the things that are happening. I do not mind hearing those things, but I do not want to hear them while I'm trying to have my quiet boo-time. That's my self-care time.
Erica: Yeah. Well-
Kenrya: Yeah. So the idea of having another adult, even someone who, like if you're close to your mom, no. That sounds like hell to me.
Erica: Yeah. I agree. Yeah. Because like you, well, not even like you, I like having people around, but when I'm ready to shut it down, I-
Kenrya: Yeah, it's like a, "[inaudible 00:14:40]."
Erica: It's literally like a wall. Like a, "Boop. I'm done." Now I'm a little more courteous because I will say, "Okay, I'm done." I used to just be-
Kenrya: Yeah, you're better, because you used to be like [crosstalk 00:14:52]-
Erica: I turn into a fucking Grinch and be like-
Kenrya: You would go in another room, or whatever. Like, "Oh, I guess she done."
Erica: Got that after my grandfather.
Erica: So this reminds me of what, well, makes me want to talk about what COVID taught me. COVID taught me, it drilled home the difference between sex and intimacy, because I got to a point where I just wanted sex. I was tired of my vibrator, I needed a dick with a person attached to it that can do some wild shit and, "Oh, I wasn't expecting that. Aaah."
Kenrya: Hard to surprise yourself with your hand.
Erica: Exactly, but also, it taught me that there's ... This is purely for decoration. I'm holding my mic up. It also taught me that I actually do enjoy cuddling and that form of intimacy. I enjoyed, I missed having snuggles and, just, somebody rubbing my booty. Because there was a point where I was about to call the mailman in, be like, "Hey, I need you to do something real quick, just give me five minutes."
Kenrya: He would've came. He would've came.
Erica: He would. Ooh. Okay, on to the next.
Kenrya: All right, let's go with this one.
Speaker 3: I learned that getting nice with yourself in a super hot bath of coconut oil, Epsom salt, and geranium essential oils packs the same punch of about 1.35 edibles.
Speaker 3: No, seriously, I think I learned, or rediscovered how sexy it is to laugh. Not on no mean or ridicule shit, demeaning shit. Just laughing and being silly and goofy in the bedroom just really, I don't know, sex has been really fun. Mostly because we've just been enjoying each other, exploring each other, and laughing. Laughing at ourselves, laughing at each other, just giggling and shit. It's been wonderful.
Kenrya: Word. A little masturbation there, a little laughter.
Erica: I like it. I like it.
Kenrya: I do too. Go ahead.
Erica: All right. I was going to say, outside looking in, someone who didn't have a relationship, a steady relationship, during COVID, that's the one part that I miss, inside jokes.
Erica: Because you know I love a good snow day, and COVID was the equivalent of a really long snow day.
Kenrya: Yeah. I love it.
Erica: So that's the part that I feel like I missed out on.
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative). Yeah. I will say, I didn't miss out on that part. It has been the best part, and laughter is a huge, huge part of our relationship.
Kenrya: The other day I started watching an episode of House Hunters, and House Hunters International. It was this hotep-y ass couple, Black couple, in Vietnam. I got maybe six minutes in, stopped it, took a picture of the episode information, and saved that shit so we can watch it when he came over. Because I knew he-
Erica: You was like, "No, we need to share this."
Kenrya: Have fun. Exactly.
Kenrya: Fucking terrible, but I knew that we would have a good ... It's like our equivalent of people watching now. One of the things that we used to do was go eat at restaurants and make up stories about the people around us, all of that kind of stuff. We lost, really, ain't no people to watch, when everybody is doing what they supposed to do at least.
Kenrya: Now we just walk past people who are not masked and are not vaccinated and coughing, and we look around and discuss and try to get around them as fast as possible. So yeah, we just find a lot of places to laugh. We have our shows that we watch, we laugh just doing nothing, it's fun. It's definitely, I think, just been nice to have that time during this time. To be able to find that laughter in a situation that is not funny.
Erica: Yeah. Like the second dispatch said, the world's falling apart, and so sometimes you just need that warmth. So I'm glad that you all were able to find laughter in that.
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative). All right, let's go to another.
Speaker 4: What COVID taught me about sex. The first thing I'd say is I didn't realize that my sex drive is tied to the cleanliness of my house. With the whole family home during the pandemic, I constantly found myself running behind my kids and my husband trying to keep the house clean. So by the time I finished home-schooling, work, and house chores, I was tired as hell. So sex took a back seat. But what I realized is I cannot fuck in clutter.
Speaker 4: The second thing I realized is while I was over here complaining, I would then talk to my girl friends who would say they were in some sort of sexual drought because they didn't have in-house dick. Meanwhile, I had it and took it for granted. So I started to put out more than I was doing before.
Speaker 4: Then the last thing I would say is I didn't realize that I desire my husband more when I have a chance to miss him. So with him being around all the time, that sexual connection just wasn't there. We had to find a way to spice it up. What we did was we introduced porn, watching porn together. Not that we hadn't done it in the past, but it definitely added an extra spice to our life.
Erica: That one was a good one.
Kenrya: It was good one, and yeah, fucking in clutter,
Erica: Yeah I ain't got it either. Things got to be right for this pussy to get wet, and a dirty house, nasty sheets, mm-mm (negative). Mm-mm (negative).
Erica: You know what's something that stood out to me in that dispatch, that kind of seems like a theme? I don't know if it's just marriages in all, or just our generation or whatever, but folks need to, they recognize that I can't see you every fucking day. I need you to get the fuck out of my house for me to really appreciate.
Erica: Do you think that's just a kids these days thing or an all of time thing that we just now picking up on?
Kenrya: I don't know. Honestly, I mean, I think there's probably in all of the camps. I'm not, honestly, in that camp. Never really have been, but I am in the everybody-needs-a-door-to-close camp. I don't have to not see you for days, or anything like that, in order to miss you. I don't need to miss you to miss you, do you know what I mean?
Kenrya: I believe everybody needs to have their own space, within where you all live or whatever, to be on their own. You know me, I like to be by myself, I very much enjoy my own company, but that don't mean I need to do that for days on end, I may need to be in my room long enough to watch a movie by myself. I want to go take a bath or wash my hair and I'm in the bathroom for a couple hours, I'll see you when I get out. Go do your thing, I do mine.
Kenrya: Yeah, I don't know. My guess is that there's always been people in both camps, for as long as there has been time. I think it's probably just easier now to get away from folks. Most people have, maybe they have a little bit more support, or it's more likely that your job is going to take you somewhere else, like in the case of the one caller whose husband is gone three or four days a week. So you can kind of build that in and it's a little easier to be the way.
Kenrya: Then, there's more people working outside of the home than there were a generation or two ago. So the idea of both partners being able to be gone wasn't necessarily a thing. Although, for Black people being able to stay home has often not been a thing, even if we had to take care of other people's kids and then have somebody else take care of our kids, that was a thing.
Kenrya: Yeah, so my guess is that it's probably always been there and we just seeing it in different ways. What you think?
Erica: I agree. Also, I think that we're willing to admit it more. I think that we're-
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative), that's [crosstalk 00:24:48].
Erica: A lot more open about the fact that this ain't the Clampetts ... Not the Clampetts, the Beavers. The Cleavers? “Leave it to Beaver.” Black and white. This ain't the olden days where we got to put on airs. I think we're more willing to admit, "This motherfucker get on my nerves."
Erica: I think it's, I mean, you think about parenting, people are more willing to be like, "Yo, my kid's a hot mess." So I think it's just the move towards authenticity where we're able to say that more, but that's my two cents.
Kenrya: Yeah, that makes sense.
Erica: Who we got up next?
Kenrya: That makes sense to me. Okay, let's go with this one.
Speaker 5: Okay, so I've been lucky. I started dating my partner just before the pandemic and we really got serious during the pandemic, so I didn't have a lapse of this past year in no sex. Thank you, Jesus. But what I learned also was how to have an orgasm. Oh, my God. I've been, I wouldn't say I've been missing out, I've been satisfied. I was never unsatisfied during sex, per sé, but damn, this is a new thing. This is a-whole-nother level. I am so much more in tune with my body. My sexual experiences are in a new, it went from earthly to cosmic, right? Because being able to suspend your mind and your spirit and physically in that way is amazing.
Speaker 5: So, thanks COVID for teaching me that.
Erica: I love it.
Kenrya: That's fucking delightful, right?
Erica: I love it, and also, I think that it's cool that she recognize like, "I wasn't have orgasms, but I was still enjoying sex." It's possible to enjoy sex and not have orgasms. But yeah, I like that. Thanks COVID.
Kenrya: Yeah, absolutely is possible. I mean, I think we've talked a bit on the show before about not necessarily being goal-oriented all the time. I do enjoy it, but it's not always my aim. So I've done a lot of reframing, and really, in my current relationship, about what it means to have sex. I think that I used to very much center it around penetrative sex because I've been with partners where that was the thing.
Kenrya: Well, not to say that it's not a thing in my partner, because he still be like, "Hey still be like need to have ..." And I'm like, "This is sex too." It's okay for [crosstalk 00:27:55]-
Erica: It's not like it's a requirement with him, or you don't get passive-aggressiveness. Yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Kenrya: Right, yeah. Right. Exactly, because I been with people who counted how often we had sex, and this is not that.
Kenrya: But yeah, but he also is like, "Okay, stop giving me head because we need to have sex." I'm like, "Nigga, we are having sex, relax. I don't have to come for this to count as a sexual encounter. I'm getting mine later, don't worry."
Erica: Oh, "Rent's going to be due some point, at some point."
Kenrya: Exactly. It's okay.
Kenrya: So yeah, also that she recognizes she was having a good time, but I also like that she is experiencing something new.
Erica: I like earthly versus cosmic-
Kenrya: And seeing it interesting levels. Yeah.
Erica: Yeah, that made me, I like that saying.
Kenrya: Yeah, and that starting a relationship right before COVID didn't push them too far, too fast, and break shit, things are going well.
Erica: Because I feel like that would definitely be a concern. Because it's kind of one of those-
Kenrya: This is new.
Erica: "Do we commit? Because if the world closing down, are we going to be together, we not?"
Kenrya: Exactly. Yeah. All right. Here we go, one more.
Speaker 6: One of the things I've learned about sex during COVID is to slow it down. Pre-COVID, married, kids, just super busy, just trying to fit in what we could, get in where you fit in. But during COVID, purchased a lot more fun things to expand on the foreplay, so CBD intimacy oils, vape pens, vibrators, just fun stuff to really allow us to slow down and enjoy each other more.
Kenrya: I think that's really great that, one, that they slow down, as we've been talking about, but that they saw the value in changing stuff up a bit and using this as a opportunity to do that.
Erica: Yeah, I mean, I think COVID has given everyone ... There have been lots of shitty things that have happened because of COVID, but I think there have also been-
Kenrya: Yeah. Very shitty, deadly, all of that.
Erica: Yeah, but I think there also have been, just, pockets of joy in things that people have discovered. I keep saying, I've never seen so may people in my life embrace creative things and become more creative people, and all of that.
Erica: So yeah. So, overall ... Was that it? Do we have any more?
Kenrya: No, we have one more.
Erica: Oh, okay, so then I'll give a summary.
Erica: In summation, next.
Kenrya: Okay, and I got to still talk about what it taught me, I haven't done that yet, so I'll do that at the end. Here we ...
Speaker 7: So this pandemic, dating, sex life has been sucky. Honestly, I just want to say that. Being a single woman living alone, not being involved in a relationship for a period of time, it was a rough ride. You can work out, but only so much. Right?
Speaker 7: So something that I used to be totally against, I started to entertain, which is these dating sites. I was getting to know different individuals on these sites, and then one in particular guy really stuck out to me, for the simple fact that a lot of these guys text you to death, or pen-pal you to death, and I just wanted a voice. You know?
Speaker 7: So he picked up the phone. He asked me questions, we had good conversation, he was very intentional, "Let's go on a date." So within a few days of talking we were already on our first date. I was like, "I like how this is moving. A girl has some needs, and I'm going to try to be a good girl as long as I can," or a so-called good girl, right?
Speaker 7: So after a couple of dates, after really good conversation, I felt like this was not necessarily my potential husband, or potential man, but this might be a nice person to fill up my time during this quarantine season, because we got to be a little more cautious. I don't think many people out here, well, some people might be, having a hoe-tation during COVID, that's just not a safe thing to do. Anyway, so no judgment, for real, because some people rock out anyway.
Speaker 7: So this gentleman, we went to dinner, we went for a walk, we held hands, all the little romantic stuff, and then we went to the liquor store, as he suggested. Then we went to my house. Which all my people know where I live. Then we experienced a good time. We began to laugh, we began to sing, we had some good music going, some good drinks flowing, and next thing you know, his pants was down and he had an enormous package. I was like, "Wow. Okay."
Speaker 7: So I was expecting all these great things from this experience, and the package was fantastic, but I wasn't so sure about the delivery. It was a very painful experience, and I understand that when you ain't got none in a long time, and he's a big old gorilla dick, that it might be a little bit painful, but I think it would have been more pleasurable if he took more time with me.
Speaker 7: I think that part of that is not getting to know him, or he didn't get to know me, and I don't think he put the work in. Or he wasn't putting the work in by asking what do I like.
Speaker 7: So lesson learned is that though I do have needs, and I might move a little faster than my usual during this time, I think it's important that I vet my suitors out a little bit, and somebody that really takes time to unpack who I am as a person so they can really understand who I am intimately.
Speaker 7: So as I move forward in this journey, I'm going to be more watchful, and I might start having conversations about sex with these guys, because that was something that we did not discuss prior, because it wasn't supposed to be the plan even though I kind of knew it in my head that I was going to do that. So as the saga continues, let's see. Let's see how it goes. Panties and pandemics.
Kenrya: Oh, you know I feel like I'm a broken record when I talk about the fact that we need to talk about sex more before we have it. In terms of what do you want and what does your partner want? And what do you expect, and all of those kinds of things-
Erica: So here's the problem-
Kenrya: And this definitely ... Can you not hear me?
Erica: I can. Here's the problem-
Kenrya: You hear me? Oh, okay.
Kenrya: What's the problem?
Erica: So here's a problem with that. I agree, I definitely think that people should talk about sex more.
Erica: I find, as I date, that you talk about sex, and then it just, niggas become creeps. There's probably a better way to put it, but I just say nigga's creepy, I don't like that. Because yeah, like, "What do you do?" "I work." But this is my passion, and I talk about being a sex educator and, "Oh. Oh." Then it's just like ...
Kenrya: Yeah, but I think that's different from having a conversation about-
Erica: Well, oh, let me also say-
Kenrya: This is what I like ... Okay.
Erica: I feel like, also, that tends to screen out the creeps. Sometimes people are like, "Eh, I'm not going to say it too soon." I'm like, "No," I'm going to tell you that shit up front because, one, you know that I'm sex positive. Don't come to me with some fuck shit homophobia, transphobia shit. Two, it tells me that you're comfortable enough in yourself to know that I'm out talking about sucking dick on the internet every week.
Kenrya: Right, and you don't feel threatened by that.
Erica: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Kenrya: Yeah. I mean, I think that, for a lot of people, the idea of talking about sex makes it hard for you to pretend that you just slipped and fell on a dick, right? Like if you have a conversation about it then you have to admit that it's premeditated. You have to admit that, as our caller said, that she had an idea that that was something she wanted to do, but talking about it would have made it seem as if it was something that she was seeking, as opposed to something that just ended up happening.
Kenrya: But the problem, of course, is that what can end up happening is bad sex.
Erica: Yeah, and I think some guys also just feel like, they want to feel like they ... The Tupac lyric, "It ain't fun if you don't know."
Kenrya: That's not it.
Erica: No, the one about-
Kenrya: You know how I feel about that song, but that ain't it.
Erica: No, no, no. The one is like [inaudible 00:37:35]. It's from “I Get Around” and he's, essentially, like, "Let me feel like I want it from you." Don't just get it.
Kenrya: Oh, "I don't want it hit it that easy." Yeah, yeah.
Erica: Yeah. [crosstalk 00:37:46].
Kenrya: Yeah. That's my shit, that's what I listened to on replay after Shock G passed.
Erica: But yeah. I mean, it's like no, it should be easy. Right?
Kenrya: Yeah. I don't see why not. You know me, I told my partner on our second date that I wanted to fuck him. I don't see the point of, what am I, what? I want to, I'm grown, you grown, we're consenting adults, I'm going to have the conversation.
Kenrya: But then I think that even if you don't have that conversation, it can be tough, and I think, if you don't have that conversation, it can be tough when you're in it to kind of back up and be like, "Hold up, this is not what I want." Or, "Do this," or, "Do that."
Kenrya: If you haven't established that rapport with a person where you feel comfortable to be able to do that, then yeah, it's going to be hard to get what it is that you need out of the situation. I mean, I'm looking at the spot where I had to tell somebody that he should just go ahead and finish, because I didn't know, I couldn't correct that-
Erica: You should wrap this up.
Kenrya: There was nothing I could say.
Erica: You should wrap this up. I'm going to be kind and let you stick around for a little bit, but you should wrap this up.
Kenrya: I just, it was, and because we hadn't had any conversations about it, we didn't know enough about each other to feel like I could stop, have a laugh, have a conversation. I didn't really know how he was going to react to me being like, "Hey, nigga, I'm not a piece of concrete and you are not a jackhammer." So I just told him to finish so that he can get the fuck up off me.
Kenrya: I mean, that could have put me in danger too, who knows? But I get being in it and just being like, "Okay, let me just finish."
Kenrya: But also, people with big penises who don't know how to use them are a peeve of mine. I have absolutely told somebody to get the fuck off me for exactly that.
Erica: It's like a fucking turtleneck sweater, like what's the point of it? I mean, it's ... I'm sorry, a sleeveless turtleneck sweater. What's the point of it, nigga? Is it supposed to be warm?
Kenrya: Your neck is warm-
Erica: My arms out-
Kenrya: But your arms are not.
Erica: Yeah, like, "What's the point of this shit?"
Kenrya: Fashion? I don't know. But I hate that that was her experience. I mean that sucks.
Erica: It's a learning experience. It's fucked up, but you know?
Erica: Knocked down nine times, get up ten-
Kenrya: It seems like she got a lesson out of it.
Erica: Exactly. Yep.
Erica: So, what about you? What has COVID taught you?
Kenrya: Honestly, what COVID taught me was that I absolutely can have quiet sex in the morning without waking up my child.
Erica: We can do it.
Kenrya: Yeah. I mean, honestly, that's the lesson because I have been dealing with fatigue and other illness stuff during a lot of COVID, so by the time I get to the end of the day-
Erica: Can't happen.
Kenrya: I used to be a night owl, and I am forcing myself to keep my eyes open after a certain point. I might have had it in my head all day, like, "Ooh, take a shower, going to have sex, do whatever," and then my ass is drooling watching “600-pound Life.” It just ain't happening.
Erica: Good show.
Kenrya: It is a good show. Y’all sucked me in.
Kenrya: But that's what morning sex is for. My partner would always be like, "Oh, she walking around, what if she hears us?" Whatever, whatever-
Erica: Shut up and get over here.
Kenrya: Right. We've both got the point where it was like, "Listen, we got to take it when we can actually be awake to enjoy it, and we can do this quietly. Yeah, we can do this quietly." So we practiced and we found the positions to make the least amount of noise.
Erica: So when your child is awake, you all was like, "Okay, we practicing for morning sex."
Kenrya: Yeah. Yeah, so we could see how we can make it work, and we been able to make it work. Plus, I already like morning sex, which is what we were doing when she wasn't here, so we figured out how to make it work on weekdays and things, when she's roaming around the house, and not call any attention to ourselves.
Kenrya: She told me, a few weeks ago, she's like, "You know I can hear you all in the morning, right?" I was like, "You can hear what?"
Erica: "Hear what?"
Kenrya: She's like, "I hear you all laughing and watching TV and stuff." I was like, "Oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah."
Erica: Oh. "Yeah, we be laughing and watching TV and stuff."
Kenrya: Well sometimes we do. If we wake up early inexplicably, we'll watch a documentary or whatever, or just be up and talking or whatever. I'm like, that's cool, that's what she heard. We'll leave it at that-
Erica: We'll go with that, mm-hmm (affirmative).
Kenrya: So that's the biggest thing I learned.
Erica: Okay, okay.
Kenrya: That where there is a will, there is a way-
Erica: There is a way.
Kenrya: Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Erica: All-righty. Do you have anything else to add?
Kenrya: I do not. I think we covered it. It was interesting to hear from our listeners about this thing that we all went through. It's interesting, there's not too many world phenomenon-
Erica: Yes, a shared experience.
Erica: That everybody went through.
Kenrya: And the different ways it impacted folks. Exactly, in some way or another. It's been interesting to hear how folks handled it and what it meant to them in this area of their lives. Yeah. For sure.
Erica: Yeah. All-righty. Well, with that, that wraps up this week's episode of The Turn On. I hope everyone had a good time, and got to go home, but you got to get the hell out of here. Two hoes-
Kenrya: Yeah, we're done.
Erica: Making it clap-
Kenrya: Making it clap. Bye.
Kenrya: This episode was produced by us, Kenrya and Erica, and edited by B'Lystic. The theme music is from Brazy. Hit subscribe right now on your favorite podcast app, and at YouTube.com/ TheTurnOnPodcast so you'll never miss an episode.
Erica: Then follow us on Twitter @TheTurnOnPod, and Instagram @TheTurnOnPodcast. You can find links to books, transcripts, guest info, what's turning us on, and other fun stuff at TheTurnOnPodcast.com.
Kenrya: Don't forget to email us at TheTurnOnPodcast@gmail.com with your book recommendations and your pressing sex end related questions.
Erica: You can support the show by leaving us a five-star review, buying some merch, or becoming a patron of the show. Just head to TheTurnOnPodcast.com to make that happen.
Kenrya: Thanks for listening, and we'll see you soon. Holla.
The Turn On
The Turn On is a podcast for Black people who want to get off. To open their minds. To learn. To be part of a community. To show that we love and fuck too, and it doesn't have to be political or scandalous or dirty. Unless we want it to be.